Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-11-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

We have seen that in many countries top 10% of people are millionaire and billionaire. They are rich due to generational wealth or business and many of them are also contribute some amount of money to charity, NGO and homeless people, whereas people often argue that being wealthy is opportunity to help needy people. However, I agree that rich people should defiantly help to other people.

On the one hand, I believe that the person who become millionaire by sacrificing their entire life to work hard for their business will never spend money to help people. The main reason behind this is value of money because they give their whole life to reach on top if anyone will be seeking for easy money and believe that they can help to poor people it will never work. Self-made rich people never do spoon feeding to the person who only waits for them.

On the other hand, people who are wealthy from the decades they are often doing charity to needy peoples. In addition to that, some billionaire people have developed team which is connected to NGO, charity trust and government entity, whereas they can help them in many aspects. For example, the NGO who run orphan house and old age home they often required doner for food, cloth and medication. Moreover, the government entity and charitable trust who take care of ruler area development and free medication they were also seeking for money to remove poverty and developed their hometown. Therefore, I agree that being rich is opportunity to help needy people.

In conclusion, I believe that wealthy people should help others.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You give a clear overall view that wealthy people should help others, and the body paragraphs consider both self-made wealth and inherited wealth. The examples of charities supporting orphanages, care homes and rural services are relevant to the question. However, the response only partly develops the central issue: the prompt asks whether helping others is the most important aspect of being rich, while your essay mainly argues that rich people should help. The claim that self-made wealthy people “will never spend money to help people” is also broad and not supported, and it sits uneasily beside your final position. To strengthen the response, directly compare helping others with other benefits of wealth and explain why it is, or is not, the most important one.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The essay has a recognisable introduction, two contrasting body paragraphs and a conclusion, so the reader can follow its general direction. “On the one hand” and “On the other hand” signal the contrast, and the charity examples are grouped together. However, progression is uneven: the first body paragraph makes a sweeping claim about self-made millionaires, while the second focuses on inherited wealth, without clearly connecting either point to what is most important about being rich. Some linking is mechanical or unclear, particularly the long sentence beginning “Moreover, the government entity…” and the use of “whereas” to join ideas that are not contrasting. Use clearer topic sentences, divide complex points into shorter units, and make each paragraph advance the same answer to the prompt.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “generational wealth,” “charity,” “orphan house,” and “poverty,” and the reader can generally understand your intended meaning. There are also attempts at more specific language, such as “government entity” and “charitable trust.” However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or repetitive: “do spoon feeding,” “seeking for money,” and “help to poor people” do not sound natural in this context. Spelling and word-form errors such as “defiantly,” “doner,” and “peoples” also reduce precision. Build a more reliable set of phrases for discussing philanthropy and social support, and check whether each expression is idiomatic before using it.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including clauses introduced by “because,” “whereas” and “who,” but control is inconsistent. Errors are frequent enough to make some sentences difficult to process. For example, “many of them are also contribute” has an incorrect verb form, while “the person who become millionaire” has agreement and article problems. The sentence beginning “The main reason behind this is value of money” combines several ideas without clear grammatical boundaries, and “they were also seeking” shifts tense awkwardly from the surrounding present-tense discussion. Practise accurate subject–verb agreement, articles and verb forms, then use shorter sentences to express one main idea at a time. Add complex clauses only when you can control their structure and punctuation.

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