Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-11-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

 

Student answer (Band 4.0)

The rich is that one has the opportunity to help others that is correct. I think that the rich is not one way to help each other.The money is need for everyone. For meal , for eating , and for staying we need money. We can help another ways for poor people like them food,cloth,and gave staying place.The money is not everything we need more things in life. Money is the best way to help each other. The rich man can do give anything for help to others.The man that had not enough fasciliteis in life how can they help others, he can help with hands like old man or woman they cannot across the road he can help them otherwise he can do nothing.I am totally agreed that there was noting no way without rich.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You give a position, agreeing that wealth can help people, and you also mention that money is not everything and that people can help in other ways. These points are relevant, but the response only minimally addresses the question: it does not clearly explain whether helping others is the most important benefit of being rich, and the examples are brief and not developed. The final claim that there is “no way without rich” is difficult to interpret and does not resolve your position. The response contains 126 words, so it is 124 words short of the 250-word minimum; 10 words copied from the task prompt were not counted. Develop a clear argument with explained examples and a conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 3.5

There is a basic sequence of related points: you discuss why people need money, ways to help poor people, and assistance that does not require wealth. However, the ideas are presented in one continuous block, with no paragraphing to show the stages of your argument. Connections between claims are often unclear—for example, “The money is not everything we need more things in life” moves abruptly into “Money is the best way to help each other.” Repeated use of “and” and “like” does not clearly show how examples support your position. Group your ideas into paragraphs, use linking expressions to show contrast and cause, and make each sentence build on the previous one.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

Your vocabulary is basic but includes relevant words such as “poor people,” “money,” “help,” and “staying place,” so the general topic can be understood. However, key words are repeated frequently, and several phrases are inaccurate or unclear, including “the rich,” “not enough fasciliteis,” and “do give anything.” The spelling error in “fasciliteis” and the unclear phrase “no way without rich” also make parts of the message harder to follow. Build a wider set of topic-specific expressions and use natural collocations, such as “wealthy people,” “financial resources,” and “provide accommodation.” Check spelling and word forms, and choose precise phrases for each example.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt to communicate several connected ideas, including a contrast between financial help and helping someone cross the road. However, sentence structures are mostly simple, and frequent errors in agreement, articles, verb forms, and sentence boundaries make the response difficult to read. Examples include “The rich is,” “The money is need,” and “I am totally agreed.” The sentence “The man that had not enough … how can they help others” also shifts between singular and plural and lacks a clear grammatical structure. Practise forming complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and check agreement and verb forms. Use a few controlled complex sentences to explain reasons and examples.

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