Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-11-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

 

Student answer (Band 5.0)

First and first think, many people believe that being weathly is not only about having a comfortable life but also about having the oppertunity to help others. I strongly agree with the statement this view because money can make a positive difference in people's lives. Especially, those who are struggling financially problems and we supports them to be like help if they want our help we have to do it. However, we learn about our weathly because we know that how it is feelings for someone you are so weathly but other are not like you we all are not weathly some people's have really facing too much of problems in their life. On the other hand, if we think this is alright of people because all people are not same they have their own problem it mean not they are not capable in their life to do something better. Therefore, mainly people think like that if you become weathly you are become very reputated in your life how others think of that and they are not supportive. Moreover, it is totally wrong not all people same either they think like bullshit thought eventhough, they know how is it feel if you are struggling because once time they are also struggling like and now they get a better life and became weathly. Furthermore, i understand that having maoney is does not automatically make someone kind or generous. Some particular weathly people may prefer to spend their money only on themselves and helping others depends on a person's values and willingness to make a difference. In conclusion, i strongly agree of that once of the greatest advantages of being able to rich is having money to help others. Although money can't solve every problem it can provide support improve living conditions and a better future.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

Your position is clear in the introduction and conclusion: you strongly agree that wealth offers an opportunity to help others. You also add a relevant qualification when you note that money does not automatically make someone generous and that helping depends on personal values. However, the response only partly develops the task. Several points about how wealthy people are viewed, whether people are capable, and past financial struggles are difficult to connect to the central question, and they are not supported with clear examples. To strengthen the response, explain why helping others is the most important benefit of wealth, then develop one or two focused reasons with specific examples. Keep the discussion centred on the importance of this opportunity rather than wealth or reputation in general.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has an identifiable overall shape: it introduces a position, presents several points, and ends with a conclusion that returns to the main view. Linking expressions such as “On the other hand,” “Moreover,” and “Furthermore” show an effort to connect ideas. However, the progression is difficult to follow because the points shift abruptly and some connections are unclear—for example, the discussion of reputation moves into claims about people being unsupportive, then into past struggles. The essay is also presented as one continuous block, so the reader cannot easily distinguish the main stages of the argument. Use separate paragraphs for the introduction, each main reason, and the conclusion, and make each paragraph develop one clearly signposted idea.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You attempt vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “positive difference,” “struggling financially,” “generous,” “values,” and “living conditions.” These choices show that you can express the central ideas of wealth and support. However, the range is limited and many spelling, word-form, and collocation errors make parts of the response difficult to understand, such as “weathly,” “oppertunity,” “reputated,” and “help if they want our help.” Some wording is also vague or informal, including “bullshit thought.” Aim for accurate, natural phrases and avoid repeating “wealthy” and “help” without variation. Learning collocations such as “provide financial assistance” and “improve people’s quality of life” would make your argument clearer and more appropriate for an academic essay.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a contrast with “Although money can't solve every problem” and a clause beginning “if we think.” This shows some willingness to vary sentence structure. However, complex attempts are often faulty, and frequent errors in sentence construction, verb forms, agreement, and punctuation sometimes make the meaning hard to follow. For example, “we supports them” has an agreement error, while “having maoney is does not automatically make someone kind” combines incompatible verb forms. Several sentences run together or lack clear grammatical structure. Practise building complete sentences around one main clause, then add subordinate clauses carefully; check subject–verb agreement and verb forms before adding further ideas.

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