Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-11-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Helping others is everyone dream.Some people believe that rich people are more privileged to help those in need.I completely agree with this opinion, because with money greater opportunities come.

On the one hand, I agree with the fact that everyone whether they have money or not can help others if they have a kind heart . For instance, bringing a cup of tea or one time meal to a begger according to your budget,or talking politely to strangers and forgiving some mistakes are the least things we can do that dont cost a single penny.These are some of the acts that dont demand the pesons to be rich , just a chivalorous heart is enough.However, these small acts of gesture cannot provide long-term benefits to the needy people.

On the other hand , money gives opportunity to people to help people to a great extent. For example, providing shelter to the homeless , providing job opputunities to the unemployed and arranging free meals to the starving people.These all are the opportunities that only people with adequate amount of money can provide.Likewise, the underpriviledged children , who cant study because their parents can only provide one-time meal to them .Such students can go to school , continue their studies , built a future not only for themselves but also for their parents ; only if a rich people with enough resources took their responsibilities.They can aslo help them indirectly by providing funds to institution that can in turn help children.

In conclusion, Although everybody wants to help those who are in need, but we cant deny the fact that people with money can provide long term and sustaining benefits .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear from the introduction: you agree that wealth creates greater opportunities to help, while acknowledging that people without money can still offer kindness. The examples of shelter, jobs, meals and education are relevant and address the question directly. This gives the response a solid, supported argument. However, the distinction between everyday kindness and lasting assistance is asserted more than explored, and the education example could explain more clearly how financial support changes children’s prospects. The conclusion restates your view but does not add a final insight. To strengthen the response, develop the comparison between the value of personal acts and the scale or durability of financial help, and make each example’s link to your central claim explicit.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The essay has a clear overall structure: an introduction, two contrasting body paragraphs signposted by “On the one hand” and “On the other hand,” and a conclusion. This makes the main progression easy to follow. Examples generally appear in the paragraph that supports them, and “For instance” and “Likewise” help signal relationships between ideas. At times, however, the linking is mechanical, and some sentences contain several examples without enough explanation of how they connect. The transition from the education example to support for institutions is also abrupt. Improve cohesion by grouping related examples, using clearer references to earlier points, and adding brief explanations between examples rather than relying mainly on signposting phrases.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “the needy,” “underprivileged children,” “adequate amount of money,” and “long-term benefits.” These choices show an attempt to discuss social support with some range. However, noticeable spelling and word-choice errors reduce precision, such as “begger,” “opputunities,” “pesons,” and “chivalorous.” Some phrases are also unnatural or repetitive: “help people to help people to a great extent” and “one time meal” could be expressed more idiomatically. Aim to check spelling carefully and learn common collocations for charity, poverty and education. More precise phrasing would make your ideas sound clearer and more fluent without requiring unusually advanced vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including a conditional idea in “only if a rich people with enough resources took their responsibilities” and a relative clause beginning “who can’t study.” This shows some range, and the overall meaning is usually understandable. However, errors in agreement, articles, sentence boundaries and punctuation recur. For example, “everyone dream” needs a possessive form, “a rich people” has an article–number mismatch, and “Although everybody wants …, but we can’t deny” combines two incompatible linking structures. Several sentences also run together, particularly in the first body paragraph. Work on subject–verb agreement, article use and punctuation, and revise complex sentences to ensure each clause is grammatically connected.

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