Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-07-24

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

 

Student answer (Band 7.0)

In this concurrent world, financial stability is imperative to fulfill basic requirements. It is often considered by many individuals that getting chance to facilitate others is the most crucial thing by becoming wealthy. While assisting others is necessary to maintain social equality and in emergency circumstances, I partially agree with the notion because the devotion of money in education and for later use is equally important to it.

On one hand, the most prominent point of receiving opportunity to help needy people by being a rich person is to keep equality. A significant number of financially stable businessmen or entrepreneurs provides assistance to lower-class or middle-class families by ensuring that they are having source of income, accommodation, healthcare facilities and so on to live a basic life. This leads to the building up of a community in which everybody has same status. Additionally, in emergency conditions like floods or droughts, when help is given by rich people to others who are suffering from traumatic situations, results into saving lives by getting help on time. For example, during Covid-19 pandemic, people in countryside areas, who were dealing with issue like shortage of food sources or groceries because of unemployment, had been assisted by upper-class families and it helped in their survival.

Nevertheless, education is also important category to consume money on. Even after becoming wealthy, people require to concentrate on further studies by travelling internationally as well. This process needs a large sum of funds to help in gaining particular qualification and exploring job opportunities for future. Therefore, rich people should also use money equally on education. Moreover, future generations can get benefits if money should be deposited in banks and within years it may become double due to interest rates on it. Hence, later the children do not require to struggle hard to fulfill their desires.

In conclusion, although help should be given to others by financially rich individuals for social status maintenance in community and in unforeseen situations like pandemic, devotion of money is equally essential for study and future generations as well. Therefore, I partially agree with the given statement as a balanced approach is necessary between all areas.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.5

The response addresses all parts of the prompt, clearly stating a partially agreeable position. The ideas are relevant and supported with examples, such as the mention of Covid-19 and the importance of education. However, the development of the second body paragraph is slightly less focused; while the argument about education is valid, it feels somewhat disconnected from the core debate about the 'most important' aspect of wealth. The position is maintained throughout, and the conclusion effectively summarizes the balanced approach. To reach a higher band, ensure that every supporting point directly reinforces why one aspect might be considered more or less important than the other.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.5

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Cohesive devices such as 'On one hand,' 'Nevertheless,' and 'In conclusion' are used effectively to guide the reader. Paragraphing is appropriate, with each paragraph focusing on a central theme. However, there are occasional instances where the flow is slightly mechanical, and some referencing could be smoother. For example, the transition between the idea of 'future generations' and 'interest rates' could be more fluid. Overall, the progression of ideas is clear and easy to follow throughout the response.

Lexical Resource — Band 7.0

The vocabulary is generally sufficient for the task, with some attempts at less common items like 'imperative,' 'facilitate,' and 'unforeseen.' There are some minor collocation issues, such as 'important category to consume money on' (better: 'area to invest money in') and 'devotion of money' (better: 'allocation of funds'). While the range is adequate to convey meaning clearly, it lacks the precision and natural collocation expected at the higher band levels. Expanding the range of academic collocations would significantly improve this score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'getting chance' (needs an article: 'the chance'), 'results into saving' (should be 'results in saving'), and 'people require to concentrate' (should be 'people need to concentrate'). While these errors are noticeable, they do not impede communication. The control of punctuation is generally good, but the sentence structure could be more varied to demonstrate greater flexibility. Increasing the number of error-free complex sentences would help in achieving a higher band.

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