Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-07-30

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Undoubtedly, the fact that the most important thing about being rich is that the individual can help others who need is mostly positive and I agree up to a very large extent with this particular notion due to many reasons which I will outline in the forthcoming fragments of the essay with logical reasoning and conclusion.

To begin with, first and foremost fact is that the rich ones have ability to change other peoples lives. To explain, wealthy people can donate money to the people who desperately need it. For example the amount of money that is moderate for a rich person to donate may be the dream of poor people. Secondly, providing opportunities for livelihood and earning. To elaborate, wealthy people who own companies or organisations can generate employment opportunities for people. For instance, the employment opportunities provided by rich people will not only help themselves to grow their company but also it will help people to support livelihood. Moreover, rich people can fund the education of the children who can not afford it. As a result, the poverty level of the nation may decrease accordingly along with improvident in literacy rate of the nation at very beneficial rate.

Even though, there are endless merits of the given statement but opposing this can be beneficial to a very smaller extent. Looking forward it can spoil the capacity to explore their own potential by the people as they may start relying on the help or opportunities provided by wealthy people.

To conclude, although there are few merits of opposing the given statement yet the benefits of adapting it such as education support, employment generation and so on completely outlook the opposing arguments. So in my opinion it would be beneficial for the people to receive help by the rich population.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses the prompt by clearly stating a position in favor of the idea that helping others is the most important aspect of wealth. The ideas are relevant, covering philanthropy, job creation, and education. However, the development is somewhat superficial. For instance, the point about the 'opposing' view is underdeveloped and lacks depth, and the conclusion simply restates the position without synthesizing the arguments effectively. To reach a higher band, you should provide more specific examples or nuanced explanations for each point, ensuring the 'extent' of your agreement is explored with greater analytical depth.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear progression of ideas. You use cohesive devices such as 'To begin with,' 'Secondly,' and 'Moreover' to link your points. However, some transitions are slightly mechanical, and the referencing is occasionally awkward, such as in the phrase 'the benefits of adapting it... completely outlook the opposing arguments,' where 'outlook' is used incorrectly. The paragraphing is appropriate, but the flow between the counter-argument and the conclusion could be smoother to improve the overall coherence of the argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'philanthropy' (implied), 'livelihood,' and 'literacy rate.' However, there are instances of imprecise word choice and collocation errors, such as 'improvident in literacy rate' (likely meaning 'improvement') and 'completely outlook' (likely meaning 'outweigh'). These errors occasionally hinder the precision of your expression. To improve, focus on learning collocations and ensuring that the words you choose accurately convey your intended meaning in an academic context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt complex sentences, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as 'the rich ones have ability to change other peoples lives' (missing articles and possessive apostrophes) and 'the children who can not afford it' (should be 'cannot'). Additionally, there are issues with subject-verb agreement and preposition usage. While these errors do not prevent the reader from understanding your message, they are frequent enough to limit the score. Focus on proofreading for basic articles, plurals, and verb forms.

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