Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-08-04
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Student answer (Band 5.0)
Many people believe that the largest advantage of being rich is having ability to help others. I totally agree with this because richness allow people to help those in need.
One of the main reasons of being rich is that it enables people to support individuals and communities. Wealthy people can donate money to charity and build school or give scholarship to those students who cannot afford education. For example, many wealthy man establish a charity foundation that improve healthcare and education in developing countries. Furthermore, rich people can create employment opportunity to invest in business instead of buy luxury items. However, it is also true that wealth has many benefits. Financial security allows people to enjoy a comfortable lifestyle. They receive better medical care, and their children have high-quality education. These advantages are important because they reduce financial stress.
But there are also some people who are rich bot they are not help other instead they are buy luxury items and only spent their money on their own such as do parties, travel many countries and do nothing.
In conclusion I would like to say that being rich offers many personal benefits I believe that the greatest value of wealth lies in the opportunity to help others. When wealthy people use their resources, it can positively impact on countless lives.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response addresses the prompt by expressing a clear position, but it fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, reaching only 221. This under-length significantly impacts the development of ideas. While you introduce relevant points regarding philanthropy and personal security, the arguments are somewhat superficial and lack the depth required for a higher band score. The conclusion is brief, and the discussion of those who do not help others is slightly tangential to the core argument. To improve, you must expand your supporting examples and ensure you meet the minimum length to allow for a more thorough exploration of the topic.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow your argument. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and repetitive. For instance, you rely heavily on simple transitions like 'Furthermore' and 'However'. Some sentences lack logical flow, such as the transition between discussing the benefits of wealth and the paragraph about those who choose not to help others. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence that directly supports your overall position.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
Your vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks the precision and range expected at higher levels. You use basic terms like 'rich' and 'help' repeatedly. There are also some noticeable errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'many wealthy man' (should be 'men') and 'not help other' (should be 'do not help others'). To achieve a higher score, try to incorporate more sophisticated vocabulary related to the topic, such as 'philanthropy', 'altruism', or 'financial autonomy', and pay closer attention to pluralization and verb forms.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the flow of ideas. Examples include 'richness allow people' (subject-verb agreement), 'build school' (missing article), and 'they are not help other' (incorrect verb tense/structure). While the meaning is generally clear, these persistent errors in basic grammar and punctuation prevent the writing from reaching a higher band. Focus on proofreading your work to correct subject-verb agreement and article usage, and practice constructing more complex sentences with accurate punctuation.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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