Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-08-04
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Student answer (Band 5.5)
In today's world, a wide range of visionary entrepreneurs, whose property is considered enormous. This leads to a statement that being rich is the opportunity to lift up people in needs. In my view, helping others do play a role in contributing to the society, which enhances someone's living standard. However, money is not the sole means to give a hand to others and wealthy people's benefits should be priorities.
On the one hand, providing financial aid to the disadvantaged is the fastest and practical way to solve the hardship. However, in order to ensure the money raised was right, it would be better to create a long-term strategy such as building school for mountainous children or supporting daily supplies. For instance, by scheduling proper approaches to impoverished areas during natural disasters, a large group of young supporters were hired to lend a helping hand to search and rescue the needy. Even after the disasters, a great amount of money was investigate to reconstruct houses, farms, cattle of the unprivileged households.
On the other hand, helping others depends on the consent of the rich. It is right to prioritize their own benefits instead of being criticized by viewers' expectation, who always stand outside of the problem. The wealthy of their lives is often a results of years of diligent work and informed decisions. Therefore, being hesitated to lend a hand to support the others from the fruit of their labor is understandable. Moreover, there are several ways to contribute to a more profound impacts such as volunteering as a tour guide.
In conclusion, being rich is a good chance to invest in several aspects of the society in order to promote the whole country. However, this cannot be mistaken with that is a "duty" - a wealthy person must help others by their money, it is right for the rich to prioritize their benefits towards others' expectation
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses the prompt by discussing the role of wealth in helping others. However, the position is somewhat contradictory. In the introduction, you state that helping others enhances living standards, but then argue that the rich should prioritize their own benefits. This inconsistency makes the overall argument unclear. While you provide some relevant examples, such as disaster relief, the development of ideas is hampered by a lack of clarity in your stance. To improve, ensure your thesis statement is consistent throughout the essay and that each paragraph directly supports your main argument without introducing conflicting viewpoints that undermine your position.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear attempt to use cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand' and 'In conclusion'. However, the flow between sentences is occasionally mechanical or awkward. For example, the transition between the introduction and the first body paragraph is abrupt. Additionally, some referencing is unclear, such as the phrase 'this cannot be mistaken with that is a duty' in the conclusion, which is grammatically confusing and disrupts the logical progression of your final argument. Improving the variety and precision of your linking words will help the essay read more naturally.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting to use more sophisticated terms like 'visionary entrepreneurs', 'impoverished', and 'profound impacts'. However, there are several instances of inaccurate word choice and collocation errors, such as 'money was investigate' (should be 'invested') and 'wealthy of their lives' (should be 'wealth'). These errors occasionally impede the reader's understanding. To reach a higher band, focus on using collocations correctly and ensuring that your word choices are precise and contextually appropriate rather than just attempting complex vocabulary.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors that affect the clarity of your writing. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('helping others do play a role'), incorrect verb forms ('money was investigate'), and awkward phrasing ('being hesitated to lend a hand'). While these errors do not completely prevent the reader from understanding your message, they occur frequently enough to limit your score. You should focus on proofreading for basic tense consistency and ensuring that your complex sentences are constructed with accurate subject-verb agreement.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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