Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-08-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Wealth is often seen as a symbol of success and comfort; however, its true value lies in how it is used. I strongly agree that the most important aspect of being rich is the opportunity it provides to help others.

Wealth is one thing that is often associated with power, freedom and comfort. However some people argue that the real wealth lies in the heart of beholder. Undoubtedly, money is the most vital asset that a human can hold.

On the other hand most of the people despite having money believe in fulfilling their needs rather than creating an opportunity for others. It is unrealistic to claim that helping others is the only important aspect of being rich. Wealth also ensures personal security, access to better education, healthcare, and an overall higher standard of living. Individuals have worked hard to ensure that their financial doesn't only support others but also provides a comfort and fulfil their aspirations.

On the one hand, being rich provides individuals with the means to make a significant positive impact on society. Financial resources allow people to donate to charities, fund education, support healthcare systems, and respond to emergencies such as natural disasters. For instance, many wealthy individuals establish foundations or sponsor social initiatives that improve the lives of thousands, if not millions. Without such financial backing, many large-scale humanitarian efforts would struggle to exist. Therefore, wealth can act as a powerful tool for social change when used responsibly.

In conclusion, while it is a matter of personal choice, I believe that using wealth to support others gives it far greater value and purpose rather than solely focusing on investing money on own contentment. We should strive to become assets to others, as the good we contribute to society often returns to us in the form of respect, trust, and personal fulfillment.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt effectively by presenting a clear position from the introduction. You acknowledge the complexity of the topic by discussing both the personal benefits of wealth and the societal impact of philanthropy. The ideas are relevant and generally well-supported, particularly in the fourth paragraph where you provide concrete examples of how wealth facilitates social change. However, the development is slightly uneven; the second paragraph is somewhat contradictory, as it introduces a point about 'real wealth' that is not fully integrated into your main argument. To reach a higher band, ensure that every paragraph directly supports your thesis statement without introducing tangential philosophical concepts.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. You use a variety of cohesive devices such as 'however,' 'on the other hand,' 'undoubtedly,' and 'therefore' to link ideas. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct points. While the flow is generally smooth, some transitions between sentences could be more sophisticated to avoid a slightly mechanical feel. For instance, the shift between the second and third paragraphs is a bit abrupt. Overall, the progression of ideas is clear, and the reader can easily follow your line of reasoning throughout the text.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate a sufficient range of vocabulary to discuss the topic with some precision. Phrases like 'financial resources,' 'humanitarian efforts,' and 'social initiatives' are used correctly and appropriately for an academic context. There are some minor issues with word choice, such as 'financial doesn't only support' (which should be 'finances' or 'financial status') and 'investing money on own contentment' (which should be 'in one's own contentment'). While you use some less common items, the vocabulary is generally functional rather than highly sophisticated. Focusing on more precise collocations will help elevate your score in this criterion.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, which is appropriate for this task. There are several grammatical errors that occur throughout the text, such as 'most of the people despite having money believe' (missing commas for clarity), 'financial doesn't only support' (incorrect part of speech), and 'provides a comfort' (unnecessary article). Despite these errors, the meaning remains clear, and the mistakes do not impede communication. To improve, pay closer attention to subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles. Increasing the frequency of error-free complex sentences will help you move toward a higher band.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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