Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-08-07
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Student answer (Band 5.0)
Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others .There are some other people who claim that being a rich person is unable to help poor ones.
I have two opinions about this given statement about the most essential benefit of being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others .I agree to this statement to some extent .The rich people of the society obviously have the strength to give something to the misfortunate people of their surroundings .It is also said that fortune lives in riches , whereas the poor or the hardworking people try their best to make both the ends meet , but even then they become unable to do so .The rich man in any sort of the society can easily help out the degraded people of the area . In this way ,the poor people will be able to fulfil their needs and manage the expenses of their family.
Helping the other people is a good deed .On the day of Judgement ,Almighty Allah SWT will ask the man that I was hungry but you gave me nothing to eat ,the man will reply .Oh My ALMIGHTY ALLAH SWT ,I`m nothing in front of your Highness ,How can I deny your Oder. Allah SWT will reply that my that person was hungry but you didn`t help him.
The given statement is correct as some say that the most important thing about rich is that one has the opportunity to help others .There are few rich people who don`t bother to help the poor people of the area.
To sum up ,I would like to mention that it is really a most important thing about being rich is that rich people have the chances to help the poor people .
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response addresses the prompt but lacks a clear, consistent position. While you agree to an extent, the argument is underdeveloped. The inclusion of a religious anecdote occupies a significant portion of the essay but does not directly support the prompt's focus on the 'most important' aspect of wealth. The ideas are somewhat repetitive, and the essay lacks a balanced exploration of why others might disagree or why this specific benefit is considered the 'most important'. To improve, ensure each paragraph contributes directly to your central argument and provides logical support rather than anecdotal digressions.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is organised into paragraphs, but the logical flow is weak. Transitions between ideas are often mechanical or missing, such as the abrupt shift to the religious narrative. Referencing is sometimes unclear, and the repetition of phrases like 'the most important thing about being rich' makes the text feel circular rather than progressive. The conclusion is also repetitive and does not effectively synthesise the points made. Using a wider variety of cohesive devices (e.g., 'furthermore', 'consequently', 'in contrast') would help connect your ideas more fluidly and improve the overall structure.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is generally basic and repetitive. You rely heavily on simple terms like 'rich people', 'poor people', and 'help'. There are also some awkward collocations and word choices, such as 'degraded people' and 'fortune lives in riches', which do not sound natural in an academic context. To reach a higher band, you should aim to use more precise, academic vocabulary and avoid repeating the same phrases throughout the essay. Expanding your range of synonyms and learning how to use them in appropriate contexts will significantly enhance your writing.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay contains frequent grammatical errors, including issues with article usage ('the rich man in any sort of the society'), subject-verb agreement, and sentence structure. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with several instances of missing or misplaced spaces after periods and commas. While the meaning is generally clear, the high frequency of errors in basic structures prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. You should focus on mastering sentence boundaries, correct article usage, and ensuring that your complex sentences are constructed accurately without losing clarity.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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