Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-08-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Many people believed that wealthy people have the chance to help people in their difficult situation, but others opinion is people can change their economy class because they get respect in society. While I strongly agree with that rich people have the opportunity to assist the public in case of provide food to people and donate money.

First and foremost, In most of the countries people have not able to fulfil their basic needs especially food and it is a basic requirement for every human being. Well-off parsons have the chance to give money to people who struggle in their life. It reduce the crime rate in any country because when people have the food especially for their children they can not involved in bad activities. It's morally good that you provide food to needy people. For example in Bahria Town Lahore, Pakistan gives food to million of individuals daily due to this it reduce the offence rate in Lahore.

Furthermore, every citizen in the country requires financial suto fulfill their necessity like education, health, accommodation, marriage, and so more. Affluent people support these people in their hard time and it create balance in the society when adults have the chance to get free education . For instance, lot of businessman gift their wealth to education institutions and these organization provide free education to students.

In conclusion, people who have lot of money who give money to people who are not good to handle their basic needs give education to their children and give food because it is morally good and reduce the crime rate from the society.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position in favor of the idea that helping others is the most important aspect of wealth. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you provide examples like food distribution in Lahore and business donations to education, the arguments remain somewhat repetitive and lack depth. The introduction is slightly confusing, as it mentions 'others opinion' regarding respect in society but does not fully integrate or contrast this with the main argument. To improve, ensure that each paragraph focuses on a distinct, well-developed point that directly supports your thesis, rather than restating the same moral benefits of helping others.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear attempt to use cohesive devices such as 'First and foremost', 'Furthermore', and 'In conclusion'. However, the flow between sentences is occasionally mechanical, and some transitions feel forced. For example, the transition from the introduction to the first body paragraph is abrupt. Additionally, the referencing is sometimes unclear, such as in the conclusion where the sentence structure becomes convoluted, making it difficult to follow the final summary. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that each sentence logically follows the previous one will help improve the overall coherence.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision and variety required for a higher band. You rely on basic terms like 'good', 'give', and 'people' repeatedly. There are also some issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'well-off parsons' (likely meaning 'persons') and 'financial suto' (a typo). To reach a higher band, you should aim to incorporate more sophisticated vocabulary related to the topic, such as 'philanthropy', 'socio-economic disparity', or 'altruism', and ensure that your word choices are contextually accurate.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede readability. Common issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'Many people believed' instead of 'believe', 'it reduce' instead of 'it reduces'), incorrect article usage, and awkward phrasing (e.g., 'in case of provide food'). While the meaning is generally clear, the high frequency of these errors prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for subject-verb agreement and tense consistency would significantly improve your score.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.