Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-08-14

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Money serves multiple purposes in a human life. A rich man always has a bunch of opportunities which a poor man does not has. According to me, welfare by the mean of money could be a choice but not the most important thing. It is up to a rich, whether he wants to take the opportunity to use the money for welfare or not.

First of all, the use of money depends upon the acquiring of it. It is either a generational wealth or a money obtained by consistent hard work. A person, having the generational wealth, might not care much about the consumption of it. He may be use it for helping others without even knowing that the person is truly a needy or not. But an earned rich might always go to check for the credibility of the charitable work.

Additionally, it also depends upon the attitude of a human towards life. Some rich people believe that money is earned to ease your life. For such kind of a person, the most crucial part of being rich is to serve himself rather than helping others. While a kind hearted or a sensitive person will always take empathy to a person in need. He can feel the pain of a person in hard times. That kind of person will always take an opportunity to serve others.

Conclusively, it is all about the subjective choices. Some think it as an opportunity to do welfare and some might take it as an added responsibility or a curse to spend money on those who have no share in it.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses the prompt by discussing whether helping others is the most important aspect of being wealthy. You clearly state your position that it is a choice rather than a necessity. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you distinguish between 'generational' and 'earned' wealth, the arguments remain quite general. To reach a higher band, you should provide more concrete examples or deeper analysis of why one might prioritize personal comfort over philanthropy, rather than just stating that it depends on 'attitude'. The conclusion is brief and could more effectively summarize the main points discussed in the body paragraphs.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. You use some cohesive devices such as 'First of all', 'Additionally', and 'Conclusively' to signal the progression of your argument. However, the flow between sentences is occasionally mechanical, and some transitions feel slightly forced. Referencing is generally clear, though some sentences are a bit disjointed. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensuring that the relationship between ideas within paragraphs is more fluid and less reliant on simple sequence markers.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You have an adequate range of vocabulary to convey your meaning, such as 'generational wealth', 'credibility', and 'empathy'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'welfare by the mean of money' (should be 'by means of') and 'an earned rich' (which is not standard usage). You also repeat the word 'opportunity' several times, which limits the sophistication of your writing. To improve, try to use more precise synonyms and pay closer attention to how words are combined in natural English collocations.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors that occur throughout the text, such as 'a poor man does not has' (should be 'does not have'), 'He may be use it' (should be 'He may use it'), and 'some think it as' (should be 'some think of it as'). While these errors do not prevent the reader from understanding your message, they are frequent enough to impact the overall fluency. Increasing your control over subject-verb agreement and modal verb usage will help improve your score in this area.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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