Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-08-16

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Some people believe that the most important advantage of being wealthy is having the opportunity to help other people. While I agree that rich individuals can make a significant difference in the lives of others, I do not believe that this is the only or most important benefit of having wealth.

One major advantage of being rich is having financial security and a comfortable lifestyle. Wealthy people can afford better housing, education and healthcare without worrying about their daily expenses. They also have greater freedom to choose their careers and travel to different countries. For example, a financially secure person may be able to leave a stressful job and start a business or pursue a personal interest. Therefore, wealth can provide people with greater independence and peace of mind.

However, I strongly agree that helping others is an important responsibility that comes with wealth. Rich people have the financial resources to support charities, provide education to disadvantaged children and help communities affected by poverty or natural disasters. For instance, wealthy individuals can donate money to hospitals or establish scholarships for students from low-income families. Such actions can improve many people’s lives and contribute to a better society.

In conclusion, although helping others is a valuable opportunity that wealth provides, but I do not consider it as the most important aspect of being rich. Financial security, freedom and access to better opportunities are also significant benefits of having considerable wealth.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.5
Coherence and Cohesion6.5
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy6.5
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses the prompt by discussing the importance of helping others versus other benefits of wealth. However, the essay falls short of the 250-word minimum requirement, which negatively impacts the development of ideas. While the position is clear and maintained throughout, the arguments regarding financial security and altruism are somewhat brief. To reach a higher band, you should expand on your examples and provide more depth to your reasoning to ensure the response is fully developed and meets the length requirement.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph has a central theme, and the progression of ideas is easy to follow. Cohesive devices such as 'One major advantage', 'However', and 'In conclusion' are used effectively to link ideas. However, there is a minor error in the final paragraph where 'although' is used with 'but', which is redundant. Overall, the paragraphing is appropriate and the flow of information is coherent.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'financial security', 'disadvantaged children', and 'peace of mind' appropriately. The language is natural and conveys your meaning clearly. To improve, try to incorporate more sophisticated or less common lexical items to demonstrate a wider range. For instance, instead of 'important', you could use 'pivotal' or 'paramount'. The current vocabulary is sufficient for the task but lacks the precision and variety required for higher bands.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, such as 'While I agree that rich individuals can make a significant difference...'. Most sentences are grammatically accurate, and punctuation is generally handled well. There are very few errors, and those present do not impede communication. To achieve a higher score, aim to use a greater variety of complex structures, such as conditional sentences or passive voice, and ensure that conjunctions are used correctly to avoid redundant phrasing.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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