Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-08-17

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is believed by some masses that the crucial factor of being rich is that they will get a chance to help needy ones. I am on the same wavelength with them because of reducing gap between rich and poor and promoting humanity,

One of the major reasons of my approval to this viewpoint is decreasing the gap in between wealthier and middle class ones. This is due to the fact that thesedays discrimination among people have increased due to being elite, helping others can fulfill the needs of poor ones and lessen discrimination. For instance, a survey conducted by Social welfare department has aprooved that there are still many people who help others when they have alot of money. thus it uplift the lifestyle of masses.

Another reason of my agreement is spreading humanity. Which means that people of this era are very selfish they only care about themselves, but giving helping hand to others can promote humanity. Also by helping the needy ones those who are elite can seek blessings which are priceless. If the trend of helping others boost up in the society, it can benefit people in the form of promoting brotherhood among masses.

To conclude, it is clear from the above mentioned points that the idea of helping needy ones by rich ones seems practical and can bring prosperity among people and society. Therefore, it is wise to accept this idea and promote it.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses the prompt by expressing a clear position in favor of the idea that wealth provides an opportunity to help others. However, the essay is under the 250-word minimum, which limits the depth of development. While the main ideas—reducing inequality and promoting humanity—are relevant, they are somewhat underdeveloped. The supporting examples, such as the reference to a 'Social welfare department' survey, are vague and lack specific detail. To improve, you should expand on your arguments with more concrete examples or logical explanations to ensure the response is sufficiently developed and meets the length requirement.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, with a clear introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Another reason', 'For instance', and 'To conclude', though some transitions feel slightly mechanical. The progression of ideas is generally clear, but the connection between sentences could be smoother. For example, the transition between the idea of 'discrimination' and the 'Social welfare department' survey is abrupt. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence would enhance the overall flow.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the precision and variety required for a higher band. There are some awkward collocations and word choices, such as 'some masses' (which is unnatural) and 'aprooved' (spelling error). Phrases like 'boost up' and 'middle class ones' are informal. To reach a higher band, you should aim to use more sophisticated vocabulary and collocations, such as 'socio-economic disparity' instead of 'gap between rich and poor' and 'altruism' instead of 'helping others'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally affect clarity. Examples include 'It is believed by some masses', 'thesedays', 'discrimination among people have increased', and 'thus it uplift the lifestyle'. Subject-verb agreement and article usage (e.g., 'the needy ones') are inconsistent. While the meaning is generally understandable, the frequency of these errors prevents a higher score. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and proofreading for basic spelling and punctuation errors would significantly improve your accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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