Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-08-24

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Some people believe that the most crucial things about being wealthy is that they have opportunity to assist others. I strongly agree that the ability to help others is one of the most significant advantage of being wealthy, although financial security and personal freedom are also important.

The primary reason that why I agree with this notion is that wealthy people give financial capacity to make a meaningful difference in others lives. Wealthy people have resources beyond their basic needs. So they donate to charities, fund education support healthcare or help disadvantageous communities. As this improve the quality of life and improve career opportunities they otherwise would not have. For instance, a wealthy entrepreneur could establish scholarships for students for low income families. in addition rich people can address problem that government or charities alone may struggle to solve. Therefore, wealthy people are important for society.

In addition to this, they have ability to support economy of the nation. Affluent people put investment in demanding and eminent companies so that native individuals can took the opportunity to work and improve economy. For example, famous businessman late Ratan Naval Tata sir invest in many companies which made India well known around the world and provide many jobs to Indians. Furthermore, wealth also provide financial security and personal freedom. Money protect people from financial uncertainty. They can afford quality healthcare, education and comfortable living condition. As a result they have freedom to make choice base on their interest rather than financial necessity.

In conclusion, rich people not only provide help to needy ones but also improve economy and wealth security to others as well as freedom.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt by expressing a clear position that helping others is a significant advantage of wealth. The ideas are relevant and supported with examples, such as the mention of scholarships and the reference to Ratan Tata. However, the development is somewhat uneven. While the first body paragraph focuses on the prompt, the second paragraph shifts focus to economic investment and personal security, which are only tangentially related to the core argument of 'helping others.' To reach a higher band, ensure that every supporting point directly reinforces the central thesis rather than introducing new, separate benefits of wealth.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear introduction and conclusion. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'In addition to this,' 'For instance,' and 'Therefore.' However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly repetitive. Additionally, the flow between sentences within paragraphs is occasionally disrupted by grammatical errors, such as the sentence starting with 'As this improve...' which lacks a clear connection to the preceding thought. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that pronouns clearly refer back to their antecedents would enhance the overall coherence.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is adequate for the task, allowing the writer to convey their ideas clearly. There are attempts to use less common vocabulary, such as 'entrepreneur,' 'affluent,' and 'financial uncertainty.' However, there are several instances of imprecise word choice and collocation errors, such as 'disadvantageous communities' (should be 'disadvantaged'), 'put investment in' (should be 'invest in'), and 'took the opportunity' (should be 'take the opportunity'). While these errors do not impede communication, they limit the score as they demonstrate a lack of precision in more complex lexical items.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text. Common issues include subject-verb agreement ('things... is', 'As this improve'), article usage ('the economy', 'the opportunity'), and tense consistency. For example, 'native individuals can took the opportunity' is grammatically incorrect. While the meaning remains clear, the frequency of these errors prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. To improve, focus on proofreading for basic subject-verb agreement and ensuring that verb forms are consistent within complex sentences.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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