Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-08-25

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Many people believe that the most important benefit of being wealthy is having the opportunity to help others. I partly agree with this view because wealth allow people to support others, but I believe that there are some other benefits of being rich .In this I will discuss this matter with information and examples.

Firstly, rich people have more opportunities those in need. They can donate money to charities, build schools and hospitals, and support poor families . For instance, wealthy people can provide scholarships to students who cannot afford their education. In this way, their money can improve the lives of many people, Helping others can also give the sense of satisfaction and purpose.

Secondly, being rich has other important advantages. Financial security allows people to live comfortably and have access to better education, healthcare and housing. Moreover, wealthy people can travel , start businesses and enjoy different experiences without worrying about basic expense . Therefore, personal freedom and security can also be major advantages of being rich. Furthermore, having enough money can provide freedom because people do not always have to depend on other for there basic expense.

In conclusion, I agree that the ability to help others with money is the most important and valuable benefit of being rich. Nevertheless, I do not entirely believe that it is the most important thing. Financial security, personal freedom and a comfortable lifestyle are also significant advantages. Ultimately, the importance of wealth depends on how a person choose to use it

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the prompt, providing a clear position that is maintained throughout. The student acknowledges the importance of helping others while arguing that personal security and freedom are equally significant. The ideas are relevant and supported with examples, such as scholarships and charity. However, the development is somewhat brief; for instance, the point about 'personal freedom' could be expanded further to reach a higher band. The conclusion is a bit contradictory, as it initially agrees that helping others is the 'most important' benefit, then immediately qualifies this by saying it is not entirely the most important. A more nuanced, consistent stance would improve the score.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the two main arguments. Cohesive devices such as 'Firstly', 'Secondly', 'Moreover', and 'In conclusion' are used to guide the reader. However, some transitions are slightly mechanical, and there are minor issues with referencing and punctuation, such as the missing space after the period in 'rich .In this' and the awkward phrasing 'In this I will discuss this matter'. Overall, the progression of ideas is clear and easy to follow.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the student to express ideas clearly. There is some use of topic-specific vocabulary like 'charities', 'scholarships', 'financial security', and 'healthcare'. However, the range is somewhat limited, and there are occasional errors in word choice and form, such as 'depend on other for there basic expense' (should be 'others' and 'their'). To reach a higher band, the student should incorporate more sophisticated collocations and less common lexical items to demonstrate greater precision and flexibility.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The student uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are several grammatical errors that occur throughout the text. Examples include 'wealth allow people' (subject-verb agreement error), 'opportunities those in need' (missing preposition), and 'how a person choose' (subject-verb agreement). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with several instances of missing or misplaced spaces around periods. While these errors do not impede communication, they are frequent enough to prevent the essay from reaching the 7.0 band for grammar.

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