Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-08-31
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Student answer (Band 5.0)
some people believe that the richest and rich one is most important thing about being that one has the opportunity to help others. I am going with both view of point .this is really help to others when we a
have more money. but some people have more ego after they are rich.
on the first, i agree this things because when people are rich then they have more options to help others who need help. for example one poor people want to studies being successful and this time the rich one have to opportunity to help poor people to gain their success. The money is more important in human life, we also help people with another things like physical help, to give others things but they are not fulfil like money do.so money is most curicial thing has opportunities to helps others.
On the secondly, i am disagree with this believe because rich and money are not necessary to help others, some time we help people with emotionally ,mentally and physically. for instance, some one need emotional support then you gave them money instant of emotional support ?no! you gave them emotional support. money is most important but some people have rich but they don't have feelings to help others they think they are rich and big person so they have more ego.
in conclusion, i agree and disagree both in this topic because the people want to help they have many opportunity to help others. If they want to help they gave the what they want ,what thing is tiny for them . we help people with rich or with out rich. some people need money help but some others want physically help . same as some need mental help. we have many more opportunity to help others if we have good heart we help every people with or without rich.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response addresses the prompt by discussing whether wealth is the most important factor in helping others. However, the development of ideas is limited and often repetitive. While you attempt to present a balanced view, the arguments are somewhat superficial. For instance, the point about 'ego' is introduced but not fully explored in relation to the prompt. The position is clear, but the supporting examples, such as the mention of 'physical help' versus 'money', lack depth and clarity. To improve, ensure each paragraph focuses on a single, well-developed argument with specific, logical reasoning rather than repeating the same general points.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is organized into paragraphs, which is a positive step. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate, such as 'on the first' and 'on the secondly', which are not standard academic transitions. The progression of ideas is sometimes difficult to follow because the sentences are disjointed. Referencing is occasionally unclear, and the flow between sentences is hindered by grammatical errors. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words (e.g., 'furthermore', 'conversely', 'consequently') and ensure that each sentence logically follows the previous one to create a smoother narrative.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is limited and repetitive, relying heavily on basic terms like 'rich', 'money', and 'help'. There are several instances of awkward phrasing and word-choice errors, such as 'this things', 'curicial', and 'instant of' (instead of 'instead of'). These errors occasionally impede the reader's understanding. To reach a higher band, you need to expand your range of vocabulary to include more precise, academic terms and collocations. Focus on learning synonyms and how to use them in context, rather than repeating the same simple words throughout the essay.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay contains frequent grammatical errors, including issues with subject-verb agreement ('some one need', 'they gave the what they want'), article usage, and sentence structure. Many sentences are fragmented or run-on, which makes the text difficult to read. While there is an attempt to use complex structures, they are often faulty, leading to a lack of clarity. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, specifically subject-verb agreement and correct verb tenses. Proofreading for common errors like missing articles and incorrect word forms will also significantly improve your score.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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