Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-09-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

 

Student answer (Band 7.0)

Some people believe that the most important advantage of being rich is having the opportunity to help other people. I largely agree with this view because wealth can provide individuals with the ability to support those in need, although it also offers important benefits for their own lives.

Firstly, wealthy people are in a better position to help others financially. They can donate money to charities, support poor families and contribute to important social causes. For example, a rich person can provide scholarships to students from low-income families, allowing them to receive a good education and improve their future opportunities. Similarly, wealthy individuals can support hospitals, disaster-relief programmes and organisations that provide food and shelter to disadvantaged people. Therefore, wealth can be used to create positive changes in society.

However, I do not believe that helping others is the only important benefit of being rich. Financial security can greatly improve a person's quality of life. Rich individuals can afford better healthcare, comfortable housing, quality education and opportunities to travel. In addition, having enough money can reduce financial stress and allow people to spend more time with their families or pursue their interests. These personal benefits are also significant.

In conclusion, I strongly agree that the ability to help others is one of the greatest advantages of being wealthy, particularly because it can improve the lives of many people. Nevertheless, wealth also provides individuals with greater security, freedom and opportunities. Therefore, I believe that both helping others and improving one's own quality of life are important benefits of being rich.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

The response addresses all parts of the prompt effectively. You clearly state your position in the introduction and maintain it throughout the essay. The ideas are well-developed: you provide specific examples of how wealth facilitates altruism, such as scholarships and disaster-relief programmes, and you balance this by acknowledging the personal benefits of financial security. The argument is logical and coherent, showing a good understanding of the complexity of the topic. To reach a higher band, you could further extend the discussion by exploring the potential moral obligations of the wealthy or the societal impact of wealth inequality, which would add more depth to your analysis.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.5

The essay is logically organised with a clear progression of ideas. Each paragraph has a central theme, and the transition between the altruistic benefits of wealth and the personal benefits is smooth. You use a range of cohesive devices effectively, such as 'Firstly', 'Similarly', 'However', and 'In conclusion', which guide the reader through your argument. The paragraphing is appropriate and contributes to the overall clarity of the text. The referencing is clear throughout, and the flow of information is natural, making the essay easy to follow.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

You demonstrate a sufficient range of vocabulary to discuss the topic with precision. Phrases like 'low-income families', 'disaster-relief programmes', and 'financial security' are used accurately. While the vocabulary is appropriate and clear, it is generally functional rather than sophisticated. To achieve a higher band, you could incorporate more precise or academic collocations and less common lexical items. For instance, instead of 'important benefits', you might use 'significant advantages' or 'pivotal merits'. The spelling is accurate throughout, and there are no instances where word choice impedes communication.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 7.0

The essay displays a good control of grammatical structures. You use a mix of simple and complex sentences effectively, such as the conditional structure 'if... then' implied in your examples and the use of 'although' to introduce subordinate clauses. The punctuation is accurate, and the sentence construction is generally error-free. The majority of your sentences are clear and well-formed. To improve further, you could experiment with a wider variety of complex structures, such as passive voice constructions or inversion, to add more stylistic variety to your writing.

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