Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-09-07
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Yes , it's true that some people say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. Following is my point of view for that.
Yes, I agree for most of the extent. If a person is wealthy and has a lot of money he can help the people in a much better way as compare to the one which is poor or has a limited amount of money. For instance, if some needy people want money for the better treatment of ther themselves or for their close people, a rich man can help them in much better way by giving money, or by arranging the better health facilities like the oxygen cylinder or a private room in hospital eel etc.
Secondly, a rich person has the better opportunity to feed the needy people by providing them a better, healthier and nutritious food, which is better than what they have.
If a person is rich, he or she can help the others by providing shelters to the needy ones. They can help by them by providing the better facilities of education through different scholarships. He/she can buy them a uniform which if they don't afford.
Rich people also have opportunity to help the older people by building the old age home, so that the one who were abandoned by their loved ones can stay here and enjoy peacefully the rest of their lives life.
Yes, its also true that some people say that the rich people misuse their money or power by insulting or shaming the other people rather than helping. But still I agree that the rich people have the better opportunities to help others.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses the prompt by discussing the potential for wealthy individuals to help others. However, the development is somewhat repetitive, as several paragraphs focus on the same concept of providing basic necessities (food, shelter, medical care). While a position is clear, the arguments lack depth and nuance. The essay would benefit from exploring the 'extent' of the statement more critically—for example, by discussing whether helping others is the *most* important aspect of wealth compared to personal freedom or influence. The ideas are relevant but remain at a surface level, which limits the overall impact of the argument.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the progression of ideas. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and repetitive. For instance, the frequent use of 'If a person is...' and 'They can help...' makes the flow feel a bit stilted. While there is a logical sequence, the transitions between paragraphs could be smoother to create a more cohesive argument. The introduction is quite informal and lacks a strong thesis statement, which affects the overall structure of the response.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. There is a reliance on basic, repetitive phrasing such as 'help the people' and 'better'. Some word choices are slightly unnatural, such as 'better treatment of ther themselves' and 'arranging the better health facilities'. To improve, the student should aim to use more sophisticated collocations and a wider variety of synonyms to express the concepts of philanthropy and wealth, moving beyond simple descriptive language.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent errors in grammar and punctuation. Examples include 'I agree for most of the extent', 'as compare to the one which is poor', and 'if they don't afford'. These errors, while not impeding communication, occur consistently throughout the text. The use of articles and prepositions is often inaccurate. To reach a higher band, the student needs to focus on sentence construction, subject-verb agreement, and ensuring that complex structures are used with greater accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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