Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-09-22
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Student answer (Band 5.0)
In this contemporary era, most of the people serves everyone those who needs because of well educated and morality. The integral thing about being wealthy is thatbone has the getting chances to assist others. In my opinion, I completely agree with this statement that being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others.
To begin with, one of the main reasons is when thehy serve others their habit goes saving money and they don't waste for unnecessary purpose. Regarding the wasting of money of different purpose, they predominanntly focused in social organization. Hence, they can help poor peoples, small childrens also, their move to right way. Their small substantial help can give the opportunity to poor people to alive. For instance, in Nepal, there is 70% of people are poor and educated person help them and they get a chance to be a wealthy person.
In my opinion, if many of people serve poor people and others, they started to became rich by they saves money to serve others and they dont waste money for unusual things. Their consistency helps to be a rich person. For example, I one person saves their money day by day, they can use that money for others purpose like helping or open a new business. Ultimately, they became rich by serving others.
To conclude, the most crucial thing about being rich one is that by saving their pocket money rather than using for unnecessary purpose eventually, serving to others.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response attempts to address the prompt regarding whether helping others is the most important aspect of being rich. A position is stated in the introduction, but the ideas throughout the essay are repetitive, underdeveloped, and often unclear. For instance, the argument that helping others leads to saving money and becoming rich is circular and lacks clear logical extension. Furthermore, the response falls short of the minimum word count requirement, containing 247 words instead of the required 250. This under-length impacts the overall task response as it prevents full development of the main ideas. Overall, the task is addressed only partially, aligning with the Band 5 descriptors.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is divided into paragraphs, but the logical progression is frequently disrupted by confusing statements and poor referencing. Transitional phrases like 'To begin with' and 'In my opinion' are used, but the overall organisation feels disjointed. Cohesive devices are sometimes inaccurate or repetitive, as seen with repeated phrases like 'serve poor people and others'. Additionally, referencing is unclear in sentences such as 'For example, I one person saves their money...', where pronoun usage and subject consistency break down. Paragraphing is attempted, but internal cohesion within paragraphs is weak. These issues place the response firmly in the Band 5 category.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive throughout the essay. The student attempts some less common items such as 'contemporary era' and 'social organization', but these are accompanied by frequent word choice and collocation errors, such as 'gets chances', 'wasting of money of different purpose', and 'poor peoples'. There are also vocabulary distortions like 'bone' instead of 'that one'. While the meaning can sometimes be discerned, the limited range and noticeable errors cause difficulty for the reader, which is characteristic of Band 5 lexical control.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0
The essay displays a very limited range of grammatical structures. Simple sentences dominate, and attempts at complex or compound structures are almost invariably faulty, featuring severe grammatical errors and awkward phrasing, such as 'most of the people serves everyone those who needs' and 'if many of people serve poor people and others, they started to became rich by they saves money'. Frequent errors in subject-verb agreement, verb tenses, and prepositions are present throughout the text and frequently impede communication. Control over punctuation and sentence boundaries is also weak, justifying a band score of 4.0.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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