Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-10-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Some people argue that person who is rich has the opportunity to support others. In this essay I will explain why i'm completely agree with the statement with some reasons.

The first reason, The most of the rich persons contribute their wealth to supports other. For extend, Many rich people starts their buisness which help to raise country economy due to their buisness thousands of jobs been introduced. For example, Mr Ratan Tata is ceo of many big companies like Tata Motars, Tata Steel, Voltas, Titan. Due to these companies it give supports to thousands of unemployed people for being employed.

The second reason, Rich people runs lots of NGOs (Non-Governmental Organizations) which help others in terms of Education, Healthcare and Food & basic needs such as rich individuals can fund scholarships for poor children, organize free medical camps, and distribute food to families who cannot afford basic necessities. As a result, their wealth can be used to improve the living standards of less fortunate members of society.

The lastly, wealthy people play a significant role in contributing to the government through taxation. Because they generally earn higher incomes and own buisnesses and properties due to which they required to pay a considerable amount of tax. This revenue can be used by the government to improve public services such as education, healthcare, transportation and infrastructure.

In conclusion, Yes definatly rich individuals has a significant role to help others in terms of providing employment through their companies, help by running NGOs which help others in terms of Education, Healthcare and Food & basic needs also they help in contribution to goverment by which government improve infrastruce of all sectors.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

The response addresses all parts of the task and maintains a clear, consistent position throughout, arguing strongly in favour of the statement. The ideas are extended and supported well, such as when you introduce specific examples like Mr Ratan Tata and the various industries he manages, or discuss the direct impact of NGOs on education and healthcare. However, there is a slight tendency to over-generalise in parts, such as stating that 'The most of the rich persons contribute their wealth to supports other,' which keeps the score at this level rather than reaching higher descriptors. To push further into the upper bands, you could explore more nuanced perspectives or provide deeper analysis rather than relying solely on direct examples, ensuring every main point is fully explored without minor generalisations.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

Your essay demonstrates a clear logical organisation and progression overall, successfully guiding the reader through an introduction, three distinct body paragraphs addressing employment, NGOs, and taxation, and a clear concluding summary. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate your core ideas. However, cohesion is occasionally mechanical and faulty, particularly with transitional markers like 'The first reason,' 'The second reason,' and 'The lastly,' which sound formulaic rather than naturally integrated. Referencing and linking could be smoother to elevate the flow of the text. To achieve a higher band, you should incorporate a wider variety of more sophisticated and seamless cohesive devices, avoiding repetitive structural openings for your paragraphs and ensuring that referencing within sentences is tighter.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting some less common items such as 'necessities,' 'unemployed,' and 'infrastructure.' However, there are noticeable spelling and word choice errors throughout the text, including 'buisness' instead of business, 'definatly' instead of definitely, 'goverment' instead of government, and awkward phrasing such as 'supports other' instead of supporting others. These errors do not seriously impede communication, but they restrict your score. To reach a higher band, you need to use a wider range of vocabulary with greater precision, demonstrate better control over word forms and collocations, and eliminate basic spelling mistakes through careful proofreading.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The essay displays a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting complex structures such as relative clauses and subordinate clauses. However, there are frequent errors in grammar, articles, and prepositions that can cause difficulty for the reader. Examples include 'person who is rich' missing an article, 'i'm completely agree' showing a misuse of the verb structure, 'thousands of jobs been introduced' missing an auxiliary verb, and 'it give supports' containing a subject-verb agreement error. Punctuation and preposition use also show persistent inaccuracies. To improve your grammatical score, you need to reduce the frequency of basic structural errors, ensure accurate verb tense usage and subject-verb agreement, and exercise tighter control over complex sentence patterns.

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