Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-10-04
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Student answer (Band 5.0)
Rich person can become a cultivate individual when he spend our money in different activities like helping a poor individuals.Rich personality always should show some respect to the needy individuals and that is a favourable habbit.
Being a rich individual is a favourable opportunity for poor people but when he get a opportunity to rich then he spend our time into differents things such as enjoy our life in clubs, spends our time in other differents activies is not a good habbit.For the instance, I sawing a many rich people that spend our time in differents unneccesery activities like enjoy our time in bar clubs, beach, visiting different countries etc. I don't like these types of people that spend our valuable time in different unneccesary activities.
On the other hand, some rich individuals spend our time to help others needy people that not able to do anything because he's not to this affordable for these kind of people.I agree these types of rich individuals that spend our valuable time to in these of activities.For the instance, I saw one person in recents days that spent our money for ummarah. Because he is a business man that's name Mr. yasir. He belong to lahore city.He spend our money for that's kind of people whose not afford these types of activities.
In conclusion, Some rich person don't believe to help other individuals becasue he is busy to achieve our expensive goals.On the other side , I saw these types of people that's spend our money for God in Word.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
The response partially addresses the task by presenting a basic opinion on whether being rich provides an opportunity to help others, but the ideas remain limited and under-developed. While the writer attempts to discuss how wealthy individuals spend their money, the position is not always clearly maintained, shifting between criticisms of lifestyle choices and personal anecdotes about charitable acts. For instance, the discussion regarding Mr. Yasir funding ummarah provides a specific example, but it lacks broader analytical depth to fully support the argument. To move to a higher level, the ideas need to be more fully extended with well-reasoned arguments and clearer support that directly addresses the prompt's nuances.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
There is some organisation in the essay, with paragraphs used to separate different ideas, but there is a lack of clear overall progression. The logical flow is hindered by repetitive phrasing and abrupt transitions between paragraphs, such as moving from general lifestyle critiques directly into specific personal examples without smooth bridging. Cohesive devices are used minimally and sometimes inaccurately, leading to a mechanical feel. For example, phrases like 'For the instance' and 'On the other side' are used clumsily. Referencing is also unclear at times, with pronoun confusion such as switching between singular and plural references when talking about individuals. Improving logical links and ensuring a smoother progression of ideas would enhance the overall structure.
Lexical Resource: Band 4.5
The vocabulary used is limited and minimally adequate for the task, with noticeable errors that frequently cause difficulty for the reader. There are persistent issues with word choice, word form, and collocation, such as 'cultivate individual', 'favourable habbit', and 'unneccesery activities'. Spelling errors also occur across the text, including 'habbit', 'sawing', and 'recents'. The range of vocabulary is restricted, and attempts to use less common items result in awkward phrasing that impedes communication in places. To achieve a higher score, the writer needs to expand their lexical repertoire, use words with greater precision regarding collocation, and pay closer attention to spelling and word forms.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5
The response demonstrates a very limited range of structures, relying mostly on simple sentences, while attempts at complex structures are frequently faulty. There are persistent errors in basic grammatical categories, including subject-verb agreement ('Rich person can become', 'whose not afford'), pronoun usage ('when he spend our money'), and articles. Frequent errors in prepositions and sentence boundaries cause considerable difficulty for the reader. For example, sentences like 'He belong to lahore city.He spend our money for that's kind of people whose not afford these types of activities' show a lack of control over basic syntax and punctuation. Developing a wider variety of sentence forms and significantly reducing grammatical errors are necessary for improvement.
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