Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-10-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is true that the most significant thing about being rich is that they have chance to engaged in social work. In my opinion, I strongly believe that individuals from high class have access to help others because they have enough amount of capital. Therefore, they help others in the form of donation. For instance, In my country Nepal there was natural disaster which caused many lives and property of numerous citizens. Moreover, people suffered from various kinds of diseases such as malnutration and malayria. However, in co-operation with authorities many high class people tackle the situation with donation.

On the one hand, The main reason why i support this view is that high class people who wants to serve their by helping the goverment to face the situation in the time of natural disasters. Indeed, most of the rich people have their own social organization such as old age home and child care home which demonstrate helping nature of rich people. Eventhough, the mentality of all well known persons are not same. Some of them have fragile mentality of helping others.

On the other hand, some persons aspiration after being rich is to help other and their are lots of charity programs which are organized by most of wealthy people to face different kinds of consequences that are faced by the nation, There are many wealthy peoples who have their own organization. For examaple, former princess himani shah have her own trust named himani trust, which helps people suffering from proverty by creating employment oppournities and former home minister Ram kc have his own old age home which servers thousands of elder citizens.

To sum up, it will be easier to provide social services after being wealthy. Most of the high class individulas ambition is to help others.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The response addresses the prompt by discussing whether the most important aspect of wealth is helping others, presenting a clear position that agrees with this view. However, the ideas are somewhat limited and under-developed. While the student attempts to support their position with examples from Nepal, such as natural disasters and specific figures like former princess Himani Shah, the explanations remain brief and lack deeper elaboration. The main arguments tend to repeat the central premise rather than extending it with nuanced reasoning. To move to a higher level, the writer needs to expand on their supporting points more thoroughly, exploring different facets of how wealth enables social impact rather than relying on brief statements and repetitive examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The essay displays some overall organization with clear paragraph breaks separating the introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. However, there is a lack of clear overall progression, and the arrangement of ideas feels somewhat disjointed in places. Cohesive devices are used, but they are frequently mechanical, inaccurate, or repetitive, such as the excessive reliance on phrases like 'For instance', 'Moreover', and 'On the one hand' / 'On the other hand'. Referencing is also occasionally unclear, creating bumps in the flow of reading. To improve, the writer should ensure that sentences and paragraphs transition more smoothly, using a wider and more natural variety of cohesive links to guide the reader through a logical progression of ideas.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is limited but minimally adequate to communicate the basic argument. The writer attempts some less common items, such as 'natural disaster', 'employment opportunities', and 'social organization', but these are accompanied by noticeable errors in word choice, word form, and spelling. Examples include 'malnutration' instead of malnutrition, 'malayria' instead of malaria, 'proverty' instead of poverty, and 'servers' instead of serves. These lexical inaccuracies and spelling slips cause some difficulty for the reader and reflect a restricted control over vocabulary. To achieve a higher level, the student must expand their vocabulary range, pay closer attention to exact word forms, and eliminate frequent spelling errors.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response employs a limited range of sentence structures, relying heavily on simple sentences and basic complex patterns. When the writer attempts more complex structures, they are often faulty. There are frequent errors in grammar, including issues with article usage ('in co-operation with authorities', 'in time of natural disasters'), subject-verb agreement ('wealthy peoples', 'all well known persons are not same'), prepositions ('aspiration after being rich'), and pluralization. These frequent errors can occasionally cause difficulty for the reader. To progress, the student needs to practice forming accurate complex sentences, improve control over basic grammatical agreements, and refine article and preposition usage.

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