Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-10-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

 

Student answer (Band 4.0)

Nowadays rich is getting rich poor is getting poor No rich people can't help poor people they have very rich hobbies they have to pay many taxes their children want rich gifts, they eat rich foods for eg.

if their income is [redacted phone] there tax is 50 lakhs in 50 lakhs they wants to survive in that money they earn by very hardworking. So being rich is not an easy task. They have also engaged in very rich activities such as sky diving , para gliding , golf, etc. which are very high level activities which poor people can't afford. Rich people are running towards money so money earning is not very easy they have to face many problems while earning money. So time is the key to being rich.

They don't have time to help others because they spend time in earning money. They usually invest their money in funds that help them to earn money. It requires too much documentation so that's why they can't help others.

They have companies on their name in that they want skilled people who have at graduation degrees so poor people have no degrees so rich people can't give opportunity to poor people's.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5

First, it is important to note that the response contains only 201 words, which falls short of the minimum 250-word requirement for Task 2, negatively impacting the completeness of the answer. Regarding task fulfillment, the response addresses the prompt only partially. While the writer attempts to discuss whether being rich provides an opportunity to help others, the position taken is not fully clear or well-sustained. The ideas presented are limited and under-developed, relying on repetitive assertions rather than clear reasoning. For instance, the argument that rich people have no time because they are busy making money or paying taxes is generalized and lacks adequate elaboration. To improve, the writer needs to ensure the word count requirement is met and expand fully on well-reasoned points.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The response shows some basic organization, but information and ideas are not always arranged coherently. Paragraphing is attempted, but the logical progression between sentences and paragraphs is frequently broken. For example, the transition from discussing expensive hobbies and taxes in the first paragraph to time management in the third paragraph feels abrupt and lacks smooth cohesive links. Furthermore, cohesive devices are minimal or inadequate, often relying on simple sentence-initial connectors like 'So' without creating a clear logical flow. Referencing is also occasionally unclear, making it difficult to follow the writer's line of thought. To achieve a higher band, the essay needs clearer overall progression and more effective, varied cohesive devices.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, utilizing everyday terms such as 'rich', 'poor', 'money', and 'time' throughout the text. There are noticeable errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'have companies on their name' instead of 'own companies', and 'income is 10000000 there tax is 50 lakhs', which show a limited and sometimes strained range. While the vocabulary is minimally adequate to convey a basic message, these frequent lexical inaccuracies and the lack of less common items prevent the response from reaching a higher level. To improve, the writer should incorporate a wider variety of topic-specific vocabulary and focus on natural word combinations.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The writing demonstrates a very limited range of sentence structures, primarily relying on simple clauses strung together without proper punctuation or coordination, such as 'Nowadays rich is getting rich poor is getting poor No rich people can't help poor people'. Frequent grammatical errors are present throughout, including missing articles ('poor is getting poor', 'they have very rich hobbies'), incorrect verb forms and tense usage ('they wants to survive', 'there tax is'), and run-on sentences. These errors occur constantly and frequently strain the reader's understanding. To progress, the writer must work on basic sentence boundary punctuation, subject-verb agreement, and incorporating accurate complex structures.

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