Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-10-07

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Rich people have hight standard life style. they help thr poor people very well. lets discuss abhout rich people help underprivilage people.

one the one hand i totally agree with that rich people help to poverty people easily. rich people have different type of lifestyle other than normal people . they live best way in her life. rich people have great education , travelling plans, own bussiness and enjoy three time meals in their life. they can do whatever he want. they buy luxury clothes ,cars ad so on. rich people face many problems in thier life and then they become a rich with mid night burrnt.

on the other hand, rich people do in their life many good thingd to make them feel proud and seven heaven. they can't see infilation people in pain. they help and full fill their basic needs. it is provide them food , clothes,small houses , health cares and so on .

not only this rich people can help the underprivilage people. an individual person can also help the poor people if they earn with handsome sallery. but yes rich people have power. that is not every one cuo of tea. so, if rich people want they help the infilation people. they try to completee their needs and take bleassingd of them they some wealthy people spend their money on unnecessary things. they should stop it end donate those amount to underprivilage people. so, their needs can provel

My opinion is that afflevent people should be provide money to needy people. so, they also live their life easily.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You address the topic and give a broadly supportive view, especially when you say wealthy people should provide money to those in need and donate instead of spending on unnecessary things. You also mention practical forms of help, such as food, clothing, housing and healthcare. However, the response only partially develops the question of whether helping others is the most important benefit of being rich. The opening mainly describes wealthy people’s lifestyles, and the claim that they “face many problems” is not explained or connected clearly to your position. Your view also shifts between agreeing and suggesting that anyone with a good salary can help. State your degree of agreement clearly and support it with a focused explanation or example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has an introduction, two body sections signalled by “on the one hand” and “on the other hand,” and a concluding opinion, so there is some basic organisation. However, the overall progression is difficult to follow: the first body section describes luxury and education, then introduces problems wealthy people face without explaining the connection. The second section moves between charitable acts, individual earners, wealthy people’s power and unnecessary spending. Linking phrases such as “not only this” and “so” are repeated or do not clearly show the relationship between ideas. Some sentences also run together, making references such as “they” unclear. Give each paragraph one main purpose and use clearer links between claims and explanations.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You attempt topic-related vocabulary, including “basic needs,” “health cares,” “underprivileged people” and “unnecessary things,” and the reader can generally identify that you are discussing wealth and charity. However, the range is limited and many spelling and word-choice errors make parts difficult to understand, such as “infilation people,” “mid night burrnt,” “seven heaven” and “take bleassingd.” Several phrases are also unnatural, including “rich people have hight standard life style” and “complete their needs.” These inaccuracies sometimes obscure your intended meaning, which is consistent with this level. Build a reliable set of accurate phrases for discussing poverty and charitable support, and check spelling and collocations before submitting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You use some simple sentence forms and attempt longer structures, for example, “they help and full fill their basic needs” and “if rich people want they help the infilation people.” However, the longer attempts are often faulty, and frequent errors in sentence boundaries, verb forms, agreement, articles and pronouns make the response hard to read. Examples include “Rich people have hight standard life style. they help,” “they can do whatever he want,” and “affluent people should be provide money.” Capitalisation and punctuation are also inconsistent, with several ideas joined without clear sentence breaks. Practise forming accurate subject–verb–object sentences first, then add subordinate clauses using patterns such as “If…, they can…” and check that pronouns agree with their subjects.

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