Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-10-15

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Yes l agree to this line that many people are rich and they have opportunity to help others . This is correct because a poor person can't help others because he has no money and he is no valued but the one person who is rich is respected every where and this is a good thing . All this become possible due to his richness. This line means that the rich person should help others because he has opportunity to help others . He must help to others to overcome their money problem. This is only the way that a poor lives happy life . This is the most important thing is that Rich person help poor . But in this society it is became fact that rich is growing Richer and poor is becoming more poorer. This is not the good thing . The rich person should help their poor fellows . Because they are also humans and they have life to enjoy so the rich should help poor. They must find the needy lerson who don't beg to others they are the person woth real heart so rich person should find them and give them money and some other kind of help so they can live a good life.

In conclusion I want to say that if rich person start to help their their poors , the poors will be happy and the poverty from the county will be terminated and this will be a good thing for country as well as for poors.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You give a clear general position in favour of the statement, and your main point—that wealth gives people the means to support those in poverty—is relevant. You also explain that assistance could improve poor people’s lives and reduce poverty. However, the response addresses the issue only partially: it largely repeats the duty to help rather than exploring why this is the most important benefit of being rich or considering other possible benefits. Claims such as “the poverty from the county will be terminated” are asserted without explanation and are too absolute. Develop one or two reasons with specific examples, and clarify the extent of your agreement, including whether helping others is more important than personal security or freedom.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has a recognisable overall shape: it presents your view, develops related points, and ends with a conclusion. The ideas about wealth, helping poor people, and reducing poverty are generally connected. However, progression is limited because the same point is repeated several times, including “the rich person should help others” and “the rich should help poor.” The essay is also presented as one long paragraph, so the reader cannot easily distinguish the main argument from its supporting explanation and conclusion. Some links are awkward or incomplete, such as the sentence beginning “Because they are also humans.” Use separate paragraphs for your position, developed reasons, and conclusion, and make each sentence add a new step to the argument.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate the central idea, including “rich,” “poor,” “opportunity,” “poverty,” and “help.” However, the range is limited and several words or phrases are repeated, which makes the argument sound basic rather than precise. Some choices are inaccurate or unnatural, such as “he is no valued,” “poor fellows,” and “real heart”; spelling errors such as “lerson” and “woth” also affect clarity. Aim to use more precise terms for people and forms of assistance, and check spelling carefully. For example, you could distinguish between financial support, access to education, and practical assistance instead of repeatedly using “help.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

Most sentences use simple patterns, and the reader can usually understand your main message. You also attempt longer structures, for example, “This is correct because a poor person can't help others because he has no money,” but the repeated clauses make the sentence awkward. Errors occur frequently in sentence construction, agreement, articles, and punctuation: “All this become possible” needs a matching verb form, while “the rich person should help their poor fellows” has unclear agreement. The sentence beginning “Because they are also humans” is a fragment, and several sentences run together without effective punctuation. Practise building accurate simple sentences first, then combine ideas with controlled clauses and check subject–verb agreement and sentence boundaries.

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