Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-10-15

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In recent times, some peole argue that becoming rich will create an opportunity to help those in need.I agree with this statement partially as helping others is an innate quality regardless of wealth.

Becoming rich makes a person capable of doing things that may not happen without money.For instance,a person can help needy people in a number of ways.Firstly, he can support their education and make them financially independent. Secondly, he can support a person suffering from a disease requiring a large sum of money to cure.Thirdly,he may help others by making hospitals and schools to equip people with best facilities.Consequently, he can contribute to the betterment of many people.

On the contrary, becoming rich is not the only thing which assures that the person will help others.Because helping is an innate quality.If a person is kind and helpful then only will he know how to help others.Otherwise, he will just flaunt his wealth and richness in front of others and make them feel small or lower than him.Many people are not fond of helping others and they just humiliate them to an extent that they no longer expect help from anyone.

In my opinion becoming rich is not the only quality assuring that the person will help others.It also depends upon the person's own values and customs whether he will help others or not.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

Your position is identifiable: you partly agree that wealth creates opportunities to help, while arguing that personal values matter too. The examples of funding education, medical treatment, hospitals and schools are relevant and show how wealth can make assistance possible. However, the discussion is brief and some claims are asserted rather than explained—for example, the point that a kind person will know how to help could be developed with a specific example. The conclusion repeats your position without adding much. The response also falls 25 words short of the required minimum, which limits the space available to develop both sides. Extend the reasoning and clarify what you consider the most important factor: wealth, character, or a combination of both.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction, a paragraph explaining how wealth can help, a contrasting paragraph about character, and a conclusion. Sequencing words such as “Firstly,” “Secondly,” “Thirdly,” and “On the contrary” help readers follow the main points. However, the list of ways to help feels somewhat mechanical, and the relationship between ideas is not always smooth. For instance, “Because helping is an innate quality” is a sentence fragment rather than a fully connected explanation. The final paragraph largely repeats the introduction and the preceding contrast. Improve progression by linking each example to your central argument and using clearer transitions between the claim about wealth and the claim about personal values.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate your main ideas, including “financially independent,” “suffering from a disease,” and “betterment.” However, the range is limited and some wording is repetitive, particularly the repeated use of “help others,” “person,” and “rich.” A few choices are imprecise or unnatural: “flaunt his wealth and richness” is redundant, while “making hospitals and schools” does not clearly express the intended idea of establishing or funding them. There are also spelling and spacing slips, such as “peole,” which reduce accuracy. Aim for more precise collocations and vary repeated terms, while checking spelling carefully. This would make the argument clearer and more fluent.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including the conditional structure “If a person is kind and helpful…” and the relative clause “a disease requiring a large sum of money to cure.” Most of the meaning remains understandable, but some grammatical errors and punctuation problems are noticeable. “Because helping is an innate quality” is an incomplete sentence, and “then only will he know” uses an awkward inversion in this context. Articles and sentence boundaries also need attention, as in “with best facilities” and the run-together punctuation in “money to cure.Thirdly.” Use complete sentences, check article use, and separate clauses with appropriate punctuation. More accurate control of these structures would strengthen the response.

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