Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-10-21

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The question of helping others when you are yourself blessed can be asked from a different aspect like if you were the one needing some help would you like to be rejected by some other person. maybe this question does gives us the answer for majority of the people.

A lot of people when they get rich the first thought in thir mind is that they are going to use their wealth for the betterment of the people and the society. this is the best thought that someone can have when they go up. Helping other does not mean that this help will get you nowhere rather this help might decide your fate. We never know where the small actions of our are going to take us.

The people who get rich from doing hardwrok they know how it feels to be helpless in some situations maybe they were in the same situation till they got rich so these people do relate to the other peoples and how they feel when they have no one to ask help from in hard times. when they help those people thay see themselves thats why helping others after getting rich is the best thing you can do for the community and for the people around you.

In conclusion, maybe the help you gave to someone else that was nothing to you might be the life line for someone else, thats why a lot of people work hard to get rich because they want to make some difference in the world.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You take a generally clear position that helping others is an important benefit of wealth, and your points about remembering hardship and making a difference are relevant. However, the response only partly addresses the wording “the most important thing”: it does not compare helping others with other possible benefits of being rich or explain why this benefit is the most important. Several claims, such as “a lot of people” becoming rich to help society, are broad and receive little support. The opening rhetorical question suggests a reason for helping, but its connection to your main position is not fully explained. To strengthen the response, state your degree of agreement directly and develop one or two reasons with a specific example or clearer explanation.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion, and the ideas generally remain focused on wealth and helping others. There is some progression from the motivation to help, to empathy based on past hardship, and finally to the impact of assistance. However, links between ideas are sometimes unclear or repetitive. For example, “this help might decide your fate” is not explained, and “thats why” is used to connect conclusions in both the body and final paragraph. The long sentences in the third paragraph also make the relationship between causes and results difficult to follow. Use clearer topic sentences, divide complex ideas into shorter units, and make each paragraph advance a distinct reason.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “wealth,” “betterment,” “helpless,” and “community,” and the reader can understand your central message. However, the range is limited and several expressions are imprecise or unnatural, such as “when you are yourself blessed,” “use their wealth for the betterment of the people,” and “decide your fate.” Spelling errors, including “thir,” “hardwrok,” and “thay,” are noticeable and reduce the accuracy of the writing. Some phrases also repeat general words such as “help” and “people” without adding precision. Build a more varied set of topic-specific expressions and check spelling; choose wording that states exactly how wealth can support others.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more extended sentence forms, including a conditional question and sentences linked with “because” and “when.” However, control is inconsistent, and errors in sentence boundaries, verb forms, agreement, articles and punctuation occur frequently enough to make some sentences difficult to process. For example, “maybe this question does gives us the answer” has an incorrect verb form, while “Helping other does not mean” has a number-agreement problem. The opening sentence is also a run-on, and several sentences begin with lowercase letters after full stops. Practise building accurate complex sentences, especially with subordinate clauses, and proofread for complete sentence boundaries, consistent capitalization and correct verb forms.

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