Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-10-22

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

I totally agree with the fact that the most important aspect of being rich has to be one's ability to assist others in many ways.

The biggest curse someone can have is to be poor. Being poor is not only the main reason one can not take care of their own self but also their families. Basic needs like food, education, house, treatment and clothing is hard to gather. To live food is the basic need for everyone. If unfortunately someone is not priviledged, he or she can be helped by someone who is priviledged. By priviledged I meant being rich and have a good heart. If nothing atleast by giving food one can bring a smile on someones face who is in desparate need.

Rich people can also create big impact on society by offering free education for people who can afford food but can not afford education. Education is a must have if someone wants to change his situation. If they can be educated by the help of the rich people, they can get a decent job to remove the poverty curse from their lives. Hence rich community has huge opportunity to help the poor grow from zero.

To conclude, there might be various more important sides of being rich, however the most important of all must be their opportunity to help others. They can provide free food or offer jobs or even provide the cost for someone's education so that he can remove the plverty curse from his life by doing something on his own.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear from the opening: you agree that helping others is the most important opportunity wealth provides, and the conclusion restates this view. The examples of providing food, education, and employment are relevant and address how wealthy people can assist those in poverty. However, the discussion is not equally developed throughout. The point about food is explained mainly through basic needs, while the education example gives a clearer chain of effects, from study to employment and reduced poverty. The claim that there may be “various more important sides” also briefly introduces an alternative without explaining it. Develop each main reason with a specific example or fuller explanation, and keep the argument focused on why helping others is the most important aspect.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction states your view, two body paragraphs present related reasons, and a conclusion summarises your position. Sequencing within the education paragraph is particularly understandable, moving from education to employment and then to escaping poverty. Linking expressions such as “also,” “Hence,” and “To conclude” help signal progression, though some connections feel mechanical or unclear. For example, “If unfortunately someone is not priviledged” does not clearly connect the general point about poverty to the proposed role of wealthy people, and “By priviledged I meant” interrupts the flow. Use clearer references and transitions, and organise each body paragraph around one main claim followed by its explanation and example.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “basic needs,” “free education,” “decent job,” and “poverty,” and phrases such as “poverty curse” show an attempt to express ideas vividly. However, the range is somewhat repetitive, especially in repeated references to being “poor,” “rich,” and “help” or “helped.” Several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unnatural, including “gather” for obtaining basic necessities, “create big impact,” and “remove the poverty curse.” There are also spelling errors such as “priviledged,” “desparate,” and “plverty,” which reduce accuracy. Build a wider set of precise expressions for financial hardship and charitable support, and check spelling and collocations carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including the contrast in “not only … but also” and conditional structures such as “If they can be educated …, they can get a decent job.” Most of the meaning remains understandable, but some grammatical errors affect accuracy. For example, “Basic needs … is hard to gather” has a subject–verb agreement problem and an awkward passive construction; “being rich has to be one's ability” is not a well-formed expression; and “someone's face who is in desperate need” has unclear clause attachment. There are also issues with articles and sentence construction in “To live food is the basic need.” Practise accurate agreement, clause structure, and natural sentence patterns while retaining your attempts at complex sentences.

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