Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-10-26

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

There is some people who believe that being able to help other is the most essential factor of wealthiness.I totally agree with view because there is so many individuals who do not have the ability to fulfill their bacis needs,at this point if someone who have enough money to help others come forward will bring a significant similarity in the economy. To begin with,having weath is will never bring satisfaction to people if the people surrounded them are not happy or not being able to meet their basic need.Although,if rich people do not support the one's who seek help,there will be a discrimination between the people of the country.As a result ,some public group will live their life in a lavish way while others will suffer for there everyday needs.And not everyone get the oppurtunity to help others.There is thousands of example about families,in which only one person were financially stable and kind enough to help other members.As a result,the entire family turned into a stable one. On the other hand,If financilly wealthy people help the other individuals who are prone to take support,the whole population will get stability in one point.Moreover,helping others is also good for a person's image and social wellbeing and it brings financial security as well.If rich people help the others then those who got the support will be able to take the family responsibilities.Additionally it is so crucial for job creation.Whereas by taking support from rich people,others can open different types of business,which is also good for a qualitiful life. In conclusion,Being able to help others is the most significant part of being rich.It help people to create stability in their income and grow a country where every individuals are happy with their lives.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear from the introduction to the conclusion: you agree that helping others is the most significant aspect of wealth. You address the topic with relevant points, including reducing hardship, supporting family members, enabling people to take on responsibilities, and helping them start businesses. These examples show a reasonable response to the question. However, some ideas are asserted rather than fully explained. For instance, the claim that helping others “will bring a significant similarity in the economy” is unclear, and the point about a person’s image and social wellbeing is not developed. To strengthen the response, explain more precisely how assistance benefits society and connect each example directly to why this is the most important aspect of being rich.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion. The paragraphs broadly group related ideas, and signposts such as “To begin with,” “On the other hand,” and “In conclusion” help readers follow the main stages. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes difficult to follow: the first body paragraph moves from general satisfaction to discrimination and then to a family example without clearly showing how each point connects. Some linking expressions are also used mechanically or do not express the relationship accurately, such as “Whereas” before the point about business creation. Improve cohesion by organising each paragraph around one main claim, then explaining and illustrating it, and use referencing and transitions only where they clarify the logic.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt vocabulary relevant to wealth and social support, including “financially stable,” “discrimination,” “financial security,” and “job creation.” This gives you some ability to discuss the topic beyond very basic terms. However, the range is limited and several noticeable spelling, word-form, and collocation errors make parts of the message unclear. Examples include “wealthiness,” “bacis needs,” “significant similarity,” and “qualitiful life”; the intended meaning of “similarity” in particular is difficult to identify. Repeated use of “help” and “people” also limits precision. Build a bank of accurate topic phrases, such as “reduce economic inequality” and “meet essential needs,” and check spelling and collocations before submitting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including conditional structures such as “if rich people help the others then those who got the support will be able to take the family responsibilities.” This shows an effort to express cause and effect. However, complex sentences are often faulty, and errors in agreement, articles, verb forms, and sentence boundaries sometimes make the reader work to understand the meaning. For example, “There is some people” has an agreement error, while “if someone who have enough money” has an incorrect verb form and an incomplete construction. The opening also runs several clauses together without clear punctuation. Practise building accurate sentences with one main clause and a clearly attached subordinate clause, then check subject–verb agreement and punctuation.

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