Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-10-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Generally, the prosperous people live according to their desired life styles that other people can not afford. Being rich is a great blessing especially, in recent era of high inflation. Some people have a perspective that, the most significant advantage of having considerable amount of money and resources, is getting an opportunity to help the needy and miserable individuals.

To commence with, as the inflation has increased to an unimaginable level , the lower middle class families are facing great challenges. They hardly managed to bear all the expenses. They are not able to help others who are needy because their own life is not easy, to earn and raise their children. That is why , I strongly agree that it is actually the most important advantage of being prosperous and rich that, they can help the needy person without any worries.

Furthermore, from my perspective being able to help someone by our means is an undenied advantage. For instance , a patient is suffering from a critical disease and he is unable to afford a surgery that requires a lot of money then a rich business man come to help him for the sake of mankind, it would be the most beneficial and important advantage of being wealthy for him. There is an another example, a kid who wants to study and achieve his career goals but his parents can not manage his education expenses. A man from his relatives or may be a stranger , come and tell his parents that "Do not worry , I will bear all the expenses regarding education of the child". It would be the most important thing about being prosperous.

Lastly, having an opportunity to help the mankind is probably the most important benefit of being wealthy.It provides a feeling of peace and soothes people minds whenever they help someone.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear: you strongly agree that helping others is the most important benefit of wealth, and you support it with relevant examples involving medical treatment and a child’s education. These examples show how financial resources can make a practical difference. The opening also recognises the prompt’s central idea. However, some points are asserted rather than fully explored: the discussion of inflation and lower-middle-class families explains why they may struggle to help, but does not directly compare helping others with other possible benefits of being rich. The final point about peace of mind is relevant but brief. To strengthen the response, explain why helping others matters more than personal comfort, security, or freedom, and develop that comparison consistently.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a recognisable overall structure, moving from an introduction to supporting paragraphs and a concluding point. Signposts such as “To commence with,” “Furthermore,” and “Lastly” make the sequence easy to follow, and the medical and education examples are placed in a logical order. Some cohesion is nevertheless mechanical: several paragraphs repeat that helping people is “the most important” benefit rather than advancing the argument with a distinct point. The first body paragraph’s focus on inflation and families’ difficulties is not linked clearly enough to the later claim about wealthy people’s advantages. Improve progression by giving each paragraph a separate reason, then use clear references and transitions to show how each reason supports your overall position.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of topic-related vocabulary, including “prosperous,” “inflation,” “critical disease,” and “education expenses,” and your meaning is generally clear. There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, such as “for the sake of mankind,” though some expressions are unnatural or imprecise. For example, “undeniable advantage” is more idiomatic than “undenied advantage,” and “soothes people minds” does not express the intended idea naturally. Repetition of “rich,” “wealthy,” and “most important” also limits flexibility. Aim for precise collocations and vary the language used to describe charitable support and its effects. Check spelling and spacing conventions, including “lifestyles” and punctuation spacing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including conditional and relative structures, and the main ideas remain understandable. Some errors in sentence construction, agreement, articles, and punctuation persist. For example, “a rich business man come to help him” has a subject–verb agreement error, while “There is an another example” uses an incorrect article. The long sentence beginning “For instance, a patient is suffering…” becomes difficult to control, and commas are often placed awkwardly around introductory phrases. There is also a tense shift in “They hardly managed” after the present-tense description. To improve, keep verb tense consistent, check singular and plural subjects, and divide long examples into shorter, accurately punctuated sentences.

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