Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-10-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others and i completely agree with this statement because it can make other life quite easier like if we can provide them little amount of money or find a job that make their life much easier

firstly, being rich has the opportunity of provide homeless for food or help someone who suffuring form or strugling in hospital for a one last hope of alive. local roads are not seen by government but if being reach as my point of view that road that didnt made by a government if i can made it then it porbably possible if being rich

secondly, it help other such as donating food for those who really in the trouble of food and hungry for a long-term.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You state a clear position—“I completely agree”—and give relevant examples, including helping people who are hungry, supporting someone in hospital, and improving roads. However, the response addresses the task only minimally: these points are listed rather than explained, and the link between wealth and the opportunity to help others is not developed. The road example is difficult to follow, so its relevance is unclear. The response contains 121 words, which is 129 words below the required minimum; 19 words copied from the task prompt were not counted. This leaves important aspects of your argument unsupported. To improve, explain how each example would help and develop your view of why this is the most important benefit of being rich.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

There is some basic organisation: you give your opinion in the opening and use “firstly” and “secondly” to introduce supporting points. The examples also relate broadly to your position. However, there is no clear overall progression from one idea to the next, and the second body point repeats the idea of providing food without adding much development. The first body paragraph combines homelessness, hospital support, and road construction, making the relationships between these examples hard to follow. Use separate paragraphs for distinct reasons, then explain each with a clear sequence of claim, explanation, and example. More precise linking and referencing would also help readers see how each point supports your central argument.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

Your vocabulary is basic but includes some relevant topic words, such as “donating,” “homeless,” “government,” and “hungry.” These help communicate the general subject of charitable support and public needs. However, the range is limited and several inaccurate word choices or spellings make parts difficult to understand, including “provide homeless for food,” “suffuring form,” and “being reach.” Some phrases are also unnatural, such as “one last hope of alive” and “hungry for a long-term.” Aim to learn common collocations for giving assistance and describing hardship, and check spelling and word forms carefully. More precise vocabulary would make your examples clearer and reduce the effort required to interpret them.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt to express a position and give reasons, including a longer conditional idea beginning “if I can provide them little amount of money.” However, the response relies mainly on simple structures, and attempts to form longer sentences are often faulty. For example, “being rich has the opportunity of provide” lacks a grammatical structure after “of,” while “if I can made it” has an incorrect verb form. There are also frequent problems with articles, agreement, and sentence boundaries, as in “it help other” and the opening sentence, which runs on without clear punctuation. Practise building accurate simple sentences first, then connect them with clauses using correct verb forms and punctuation.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.