Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 11 · 2026-10-31

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

A hand full of people are of the opinion that the most relevant aspect of being well-to-do is the it gives the person the opportunity to assist the needy. i strongly agree. in this essay, i will give the reason why i belive the is true.

To begin, being rich gives one the opportunity to help people in need becouse you cant give what you dont have. one can help another in need only when they have the means to do so. for example, mr Alex met his neighbours hungry child on the stree, and was able to buy him food to eat becouse he had the money to buy somthing for him. again, the rich are influential, having the the resources to help others being the most important thing about being rich, this means the rich has influence and connections. they can link one with others who can also be of help to someone who needs assistance. for example, i was given a job offer in a reputable firm because my uncle is the assistant director in the organization.

Contrassingly, having in mind that money answereth all things, the needy cant help the needy. a blind man can't also lead the blind. for example, if i cant afford my rent, i cant pay rent for somebody who came to me asking for money to pay his rent. if someone can't cloth himself, he can't also cloth the naked.

Inconclusion, i strongly agree with some poepl who believe that the most important aspect of being wealthy is that it gives the person the opportunity to render helping hand to others because rich person who cannot help someone in need is not wealthy.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear from the introduction (“I strongly agree”) and remains consistent in the conclusion. You address the central claim by explaining that wealth provides practical means to support people, and you add a second point about influence and connections. The examples of buying food and helping someone access a job are relevant. However, the discussion of influence is not fully tied to why helping others is the most important aspect of wealth, and the opposing paragraph mainly repeats the idea that people without resources cannot help, rather than considering another value of being rich. Develop each reason further and explain why helping others matters more than personal comfort, security, or status.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs presenting supporting and contrasting points, and a conclusion. The sequence is generally understandable, and examples help illustrate the claims. However, progression within the first body paragraph is uneven: it moves from providing food to influence and job connections without clearly explaining the relationship between these ideas. Linking expressions such as “To begin,” “again,” and “Contrassingly” are sometimes mechanical or inaccurate, while repeated references to “help” and “the rich” make connections less precise. Use topic sentences to signal each paragraph’s main point, and connect examples explicitly to the argument they support.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “well-to-do,” “influential,” “resources,” “reputable firm,” and “assistance.” These choices show an attempt to go beyond very basic language. However, spelling and word-choice errors are noticeable, including “hand full,” “belive,” “becouse,” “Contrassingly,” and “poepl.” Some expressions are also unnatural or imprecise: “render helping hand” and “money answereth all things” do not fit the essay’s formal style, and “cloth himself” is not the intended verb. Aim for accurate, natural collocations and check spelling carefully; this would make your meaning clearer and your vocabulary more effective.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a conditional example (“if I can’t afford my rent, I can’t pay rent for somebody”) and a relative clause (“who believe that…”). The overall meaning is usually recoverable, but grammatical control is inconsistent. Examples include “the it gives the person,” “the rich has influence,” and “having the resources … this means,” where sentence structure or agreement is faulty. Several sentences also run together, particularly in the first body paragraph, and capitalisation and punctuation are not consistently controlled. Practise building complete sentences with clear subjects and verbs, checking agreement and articles, and separating independent clauses with appropriate punctuation.

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