Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-03

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below shows the number of tourists visiting a particular Caribbean island between 2010 and 2017.

Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Here we have data on a graph which shows the number of tourists who visited island between 2010 to 2017.

So we have data in main two parts like some are visiting and staying on a cruise ships and some are staying on island so this two types of turist are there between year 2010 to 2017.

In year total number of visiters are one millions which is the lower most number in a graph on that year from that total number of one million visiters 0.75 millon visitors are stayion on island and rest of 0.25 millons are on a cruise ship

Now new year new data so in year 2011 there are total 1.25 millons visiters are visited caribbean island and out of that 1.25 millions 0.75 are on a island and 0.5 millions visiters are stays on a cruise ships now year changes now the total number of visiters are increced then before and it touch to 1.5 millions visitors in a year of 2012 and out of that 1.25 millions staying on island but this year number for the cruise ships was not that great! it is same as year 2010 which is not that good compare to year 2011

now total numbers in growing and now it is double then the year 2010 it touchs 2 millions visiters in a year also the number are growing on both the staying options it became 1.5 on a island and 0.5 on a cruise ships those are quite good then the previues numbers of 2012

Now new year new story new numbers now the total is 2.5 millions visiters in a year and out of that 1.5 millions on a island which is same as the last year but number of visiters who is staying on a cruise ships is uplefted it became 1 millions which is so good then the past 4 years now in a year 2015 visiters are growing but those are not much intrested to stay on island becasue the total number is increced but not for the island so rest are chooseing cruise ships and like this

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

The response attempts to present data from the line graph regarding tourists visiting a Caribbean island from 2010 to 2017. However, the task is only addressed in a minimal and fragmented way. While the writer manages to pick out several individual data points for specific years, such as 2010, 2011, and 2012, there is no clear overview of the main trends shown in the graph. The information is presented in a mechanical, point-by-point narrative rather than a well-summarised report, and the writing trails off before completing the full period up to 2017. To reach a higher level, the response needs to select and highlight overall trends and key comparisons rather than attempting to list every single detail year by year.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The organisational structure of the response is extremely weak, lacking standard paragraphing entirely. The text is written as a continuous, conversational block of thoughts, creating a conversational and run-on effect. Cohesive devices are either missing or repetitive and inappropriate, relying heavily on conversational fillers and repetitive phrases like 'Now new year new story' or 'and like this'. There is no clear logical progression guiding the reader through the data. To improve in this area, the writer must divide the response into clear paragraphs, such as an introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs, while using a wider and more accurate range of cohesive links to connect ideas smoothly.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The vocabulary used throughout the essay is basic, repetitive, and heavily restricted. The student continually relies on elementary terms such as 'data', 'graph', 'visiters', and 'numbers', alongside numerous spelling and word-form errors like 'visiters', 'turist', 'millon', 'stayion', 'increced', 'previues', 'uplefted', and 'intrested'. There is little evidence of less common lexical items, and word choices often sound informal or unnatural, such as 'not that great' or 'new year new story'. To achieve a higher score, the writer needs to incorporate a broader range of precise vocabulary relating to data reporting, such as verbs of change (fluctuate, peak, decline) and accurately spelled nouns.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The grammatical structures employed are overly simplistic and repetitive, consisting largely of run-on sentences joined by coordinating conjunctions like 'and' or conversational transitions without proper punctuation. There is a complete absence of complex sentence forms, and punctuation is largely misused, with comma splices and missing periods making the text difficult to parse. Frequent errors in basic grammar, tense usage, and agreement are evident throughout the text, such as 'there is total 1.25 millons visiters are visited' and 'number of visiters who is staying'. To progress, the writer must work on basic sentence boundary control, correct subject-verb agreement, and incorporating a mix of accurate complex sentence structures.

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