Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-08-09
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
Nowadays, advertisements have become a topic of considerable debate all over the world. Some people think that it convince us to buy things. Others believe that advertisements are outdated and unable to capture our attention anymore. In this essay both the sides will be discussed before presenting a conclusion.
On one hand, proponents say that advertisements have a significant affect on attracting people's attention. People are more draw towards the products which are promoted by influencers and YouTubers. They purchase those things which are over hyped, even if they are not needed at the time. For instance, if someone is passing by a clothes outlet, the attractive pictures of an outfit or a tag of sale, make them think to visit the outlet, and ultimately they come up with buying an unnecessary product.
On the other hand, opponents argue that advertisements have become very common, and people know the tactics and approaches used behind the them. So, they are no longer successful in influencing the customers. For example, everyone is aware of clearance sale at the end of the season every year, and they are use to it. As a result, people just ignore it and buy the things only, when they are needed.
In my opinion, I agree with the point that advertisements have a profound influence on people's minds. The industries are working in a coordination with psychologists to update the approaches used behind the advertisements. Consequently, they are successful in their objectives and have a significant impact on people's thinking.
In conclusion, although, individuals are well aware of the aim behind the adverts, the innovative ideas used to make those advertisements are successful in attracting their target market.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The essay addresses all parts of the prompt, discussing both views and providing a clear personal opinion. The ideas are relevant, such as the influence of social media influencers and the psychological tactics used by industries. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat limited; for instance, the explanation of why people ignore advertisements could be more deeply explored with more specific examples beyond just 'clearance sales'. The position is consistent throughout the essay, and the conclusion effectively summarizes the argument. To reach a higher band, ensure that each body paragraph provides a more thorough analysis of the implications of the arguments presented.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the two opposing views. Cohesive devices such as 'On one hand', 'On the other hand', 'For instance', and 'Consequently' are used to guide the reader through the argument. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical, and there are minor issues with referencing, such as 'behind the them' in the third paragraph, which disrupts the flow. Overall, the progression of ideas is clear, and the structure supports the reader's understanding of the writer's position.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The range of vocabulary is adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express ideas clearly. There are attempts to use topic-specific vocabulary such as 'proponents', 'opponents', 'target market', and 'profound influence'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'significant affect' (should be 'effect') and 'come up with buying' (which is unnatural). While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey the intended meaning, it lacks the precision and sophistication required for a higher band score. The errors do not impede communication, but they do highlight a need for more careful attention to word forms and collocations.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the writer attempts complex sentences, there are frequent grammatical errors that persist throughout the text. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues like 'it convince us' (should be 'it convinces us') and 'they are use to it' (should be 'they are used to it'). Additionally, there are minor punctuation errors, such as the unnecessary comma in the final paragraph: 'although, individuals'. While these errors do not prevent the reader from understanding the message, they occur frequently enough to prevent the essay from reaching a higher band. More focus on proofreading for basic grammatical accuracy is recommended.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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