Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-08-25

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

There is a growing debate over whether advertising is helping to attract more buyers. While some people argue that in the modern day, it is quite common that no one considers it when purchasing anything. In my opinion, it requires a large amount of budget, and commercial advertising plays a vital role in gaining attention because it is a more efficient marketing strategy.

On the one hand, supporters of advertising believe that it is

beneficial to persuade people to purchase more things. Today, marketing campaigns have the potential to attract customers worldwide, it can help to expand their business more significantly. For instance, companies can do promotions and publicity of their goods through social media platforms and internet celebrity influencers. As a result, it can drive more valuable people to purchase their product, which can help to generate increased revenue. From this perspective, business who are thriving can get a large amount of benefits.

On the other hand, the individuals who are against advertising believe that no one depends on product publicity because people prefer to buy things they are satisfied with and familiar. They believe that nowadays there is a plethora of businesses that do a lot of advertising, usually, people do not watch adverts. Users consider commercials as disturbing, a good example of this would be people purchasing YouTube Premium subscriptions to avoid ads. This shows that the growth of many businesses in the market is increasing promotional activity, which has an adverse effect on campaigns.

In conclusion, both perspectives have their merits. However, I am more convinced that advertising is extremely persuasive in increasing the growth of businesses, because it can convince people to buy a specific product and generate bigger revenue.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion in the introduction and conclusion. The ideas are relevant, such as the mention of social media influencers and the use of ad-blockers like YouTube Premium. However, the development of these points is somewhat superficial. For example, the argument regarding the 'adverse effect' of promotional activity on campaigns is a bit vague and could have been explained with more depth. Overall, the task is addressed adequately, but the supporting arguments could be more thoroughly extended to reach a higher band.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is logically organized into clear paragraphs, each with a distinct focus. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'On the one hand', 'On the other hand', and 'In conclusion', which help guide the reader through the argument. However, some transitions are slightly mechanical, and there are minor issues with referencing, such as the phrase 'valuable people' which is an awkward collocation. The progression of ideas is generally clear, but the flow between sentences could be improved by using a wider variety of linking words beyond the standard paragraph starters.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express their ideas clearly. There are some attempts at less common vocabulary, such as 'plethora' and 'promotional activity'. However, there are instances of imprecise word choice and awkward collocations, such as 'valuable people' instead of 'potential customers' or 'target audience', and 'do promotions and publicity' which is slightly unnatural. While the meaning is never in doubt, the range is not yet flexible or sophisticated enough to reach the higher bands.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are some grammatical errors, such as 'business who are thriving' (should be 'businesses') and 'familiar' (should be 'familiar with them'). Additionally, there are some run-on sentences and comma splices, such as 'Today, marketing campaigns have the potential to attract customers worldwide, it can help to expand...'. While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent the essay from reaching a higher band. More attention to subject-verb agreement and punctuation would improve the accuracy.

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