Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-08-25

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Many critics argue whether the promotions grabs the attention of consumers or not. This essay will try to explore both the views and try to conclude concrete opinion.

Proponents argue that promotions apply unnecessary hooks to catch the focus of a customer towards them. Moreover, they apply various kind of human's temptations in the commercial. For instance, if a company is trying to sell chocolate, they will put an attractive lady performing lustful activities and try to manipulate an individual to purchase such goods. Ultimately, corporations apply varieties of seduction elements in the ads to catch the awareness of the public.

While other debaters showcase a point that promotions are regular part of an individual's life in the era of technology. As a consequence, our cognitive ability automatically neglects the commercials and engage in other important activities. To illustrate a point, if an commercial is being played in the bus station, our brain will ignore such visuals and more focus towards waiting for the bus or try to focus on different aspects like money, studies or work etc. Finally, in the era of technology, promotions are just a regular part of a day and our brain is familiar with such visuals. As a consequence, overlook such videos and diverts the awareness towards more important aspects of life.

In conclusion, I believe that commercials are regular part of life and our body has adopted according to the distractions. As a result, our brain is trained to pass appeared visuals and allows us to use for different purposes. However, some firms are effective to create a hook and attract consumers towards their product by the use of luscious visuals.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The essay addresses both views and provides a personal opinion, meeting the basic requirements of the prompt. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. The arguments regarding 'lustful activities' in advertising are a bit narrow and lack nuance. While the second view is better explained, the conclusion is slightly contradictory, as it acknowledges the effectiveness of ads while simultaneously claiming they are easily ignored. To reach a higher band, you should expand on the psychological or economic reasons behind these perspectives rather than relying on repetitive examples. The position is clear, but the depth of analysis could be improved to better support the arguments presented.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. You use some cohesive devices such as 'Moreover', 'For instance', and 'In conclusion' to link ideas. However, the flow between sentences is occasionally mechanical. For example, the transition between the second and third paragraphs could be smoother. Additionally, some referencing is slightly unclear, such as the phrase 'our body has adopted according to the distractions' in the conclusion, which does not clearly link back to the previous arguments. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that each paragraph has a strong topic sentence would enhance the overall coherence.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using words like 'proponents', 'manipulate', and 'cognitive ability'. However, there are several instances of awkward word choice and collocation errors. For example, 'apply unnecessary hooks' and 'lustful activities' are not the most natural ways to describe marketing tactics. The phrase 'pass appeared visuals' is also unclear. To improve, focus on learning collocations—words that naturally go together—rather than just individual synonyms. Expanding your range to include more precise academic vocabulary will help you move beyond a band 6.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt complex sentences, there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the flow. For instance, 'Many critics argue whether the promotions grabs' contains a subject-verb agreement error. You also have issues with articles and prepositions, such as 'if an commercial is being played' (should be 'a commercial') and 'more focus towards' (should be 'focus more on'). While these errors do not prevent the reader from understanding your meaning, they are frequent enough to limit your score. Focus on proofreading for subject-verb agreement and basic article usage.

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