Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-08-31
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
In the modern era, advertising has become an integral part of our daily lives. There are contrasting perspectives about advertising. While a proportion of individuals believe that promotional content is highly effective at persuading consumers to purchase products. Others contend that commercial messages are so common that humans do not pay attention to it. This essay will examine both point of views and my perspective.
According to the surveys, advertising can strongly influence consumers to making purchasing decisions. Advertisements frequently use celebrities, attractive images and backgrounds, emotional story telling and some limited offers to attract customers. For example, when a well known actress is promoting a beauty product can make customers rather than using an unpopular girl. Consequently, many young girls purchase beauty products not because of their genuine necessity but because the advertisement cultivated a perceived need for them. In addition, some companies promote the same brand across television, social media and websites make the brand more familiar and easier to remember. For instance, some brands such as Coca-cola repeatedly display their contents via different media platforms. which can increase long term loyalty, brand recognition and sales.
On the other hand, The large amount of promotion contents that people encounter everyday can reduce it effectiveness. Individuals are frequently exposed to promotional messages while they are watching television, social media or browsing websites. They scroll that kind of content posts via social media without reading. As the result of this causes companies cannot distribute their products among the society. Furthermore, consumers are able to read customer feedbacks, and compare prices via social media before making purchasing decisions Therefore they may rely more on personal research and recommendation more than on advertising. Customers can buy high quality products according to their personal references. This means companies cannot always persuade consumers merely by displaying their products repeatedly.
From my perspective, I believe that promotion contents are a successful pathway to attract consumers. Although its success depends on how it is designed and how frequently it is shown. Creative and relevant advertisement can influence consumers. specially when they use trusted public figures and emotional contents. However, repetitive and excessive advertising is likely to be ignored. Advertising is still powerful, but in the modern world most people are increasingly use some methods for before making purchase.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5
The response addresses all parts of the prompt, discussing both views and providing a clear personal opinion. The ideas are relevant and generally well-supported, such as the mention of celebrity endorsements and the shift toward personal research. However, some arguments could be more thoroughly developed; for instance, the explanation of why consumers ignore ads is a bit repetitive. The position is consistent throughout, and the conclusion effectively synthesizes the two viewpoints. To reach a higher band, ensure that each supporting point is fully explored with more nuanced analysis rather than relying on general statements.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the different perspectives. Cohesive devices such as 'consequently,' 'in addition,' and 'on the other hand' are used to link ideas. However, there are some mechanical errors in cohesion, such as the sentence fragment 'which can increase long term loyalty...' and the awkward phrasing 'As the result of this causes companies cannot...' which disrupts the flow. Improving the variety and accuracy of linking words would enhance the overall coherence of the essay.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, with some attempts at topic-specific language like 'promotional content,' 'brand recognition,' and 'purchasing decisions.' However, there are instances of imprecise word choice and collocation errors, such as 'distribute their products among the society' (instead of 'market their products to the public') and 'personal references' (when 'personal research' or 'preferences' was intended). The range is sufficient to convey meaning, but more precise and sophisticated vocabulary is needed to reach a higher band.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with sentence fragments and subject-verb agreement. For example, 'when a well known actress is promoting a beauty product can make customers...' is grammatically incorrect. Additionally, there are punctuation issues, such as starting sentences with 'Therefore' without proper clause connection. While the errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. Focusing on sentence boundary control and subject-verb consistency will significantly improve the accuracy.
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