Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-09-07
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
In recent decades, advertisement has become a defining trend in all over the world. In this context, people have different opinion that advertising is successful or common. Notably, a part of the society believes that advertisement is not so important while I support others who contend that advertisement is extraordinary successful. This essay discusses these perspectives to substantiate my viewpoint.
On the one hand, advertising is same and unattractive which reduces people's attention. To commence with, most of the company using same actors-actresses for their advertisement. This means that similar kind of people and similar thoughts of advertisement reduces people minds towards the advertisement. For instance, in India, at the start, people are love to watch advertisement of PUMA brand but because of similar casts people are now dislike their ads. In addition, many of the company using similar ads for their product's advertisement. This shows that showing similar advertising again and again change people's minds towards it. Hence, unattractive, similar casts, and repetation of similar advertising change people's mind towards the buying things.
On the other hand, extraordinary technology play an important role in advertisement. First and foremost, nowadays, organisation made advertisement creazy and energetic. This results that young generations love to watch those advertisement and they buy things. Secondly, in this modern era, technology made advertisment very attractive. This suggest that loud music, breathtaking scenarios and famous stars attract the people's mind towards the watch advertisement and purchase things. For example, in Australia, KFC use different types of things for the advertisement and it gain a lot of attention from the buyers. Therefore, energetic and extraordinary things enhance people's attention.
To recapitulate, despite the fact that similar character and repetation reduces the interest while I believe creazy and attractive locations made advertisement successful. Thus, both are the reasons have their own importance.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response addresses both views and provides a clear personal opinion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you mention the repetition of actors and the use of technology, the arguments lack depth and specific analysis. For instance, the example of the PUMA brand is mentioned but not fully explained in terms of how it impacts consumer psychology. To reach a higher band, ensure that each point is supported by a more detailed explanation of the 'why' and 'how' rather than just stating the observation. The conclusion is a bit brief and could better synthesize the main arguments presented in the body paragraphs.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, and there is a logical progression of ideas. You use basic cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand,' 'On the other hand,' and 'To recapitulate' to signal shifts in the argument. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly awkward, such as 'This suggest that' or 'This shows that.' Additionally, the referencing is occasionally unclear, and some sentences feel disjointed. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring smoother transitions between sentences would enhance the overall flow and coherence of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it is somewhat repetitive and lacks precision. You rely on basic terms like 'good,' 'bad,' or 'things' in several instances. There are also some word-choice errors, such as 'creazy' (likely meant 'creative' or 'engaging') and 'repetation' (repetition). While you attempt to use some topic-specific vocabulary like 'persuading' and 'modern era,' the range is limited. To improve, focus on using more sophisticated synonyms and ensuring correct spelling and collocation, which will help convey your ideas with greater clarity and impact.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede readability. Issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'most of the company using,' 'organisation made'), article usage (e.g., 'in all over the world'), and word form errors (e.g., 'people are love to watch'). While the meaning is generally clear, these persistent errors prevent the writing from reaching a higher band. Focusing on basic grammatical accuracy, particularly verb tenses and pluralization, will significantly improve the quality of your writing.
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