Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-05
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
People hold different views regarding advertising. In today's rapidly advancing world many citizens and businessmen use advertising for boost their business. Some people believe that it is very crucial way for successful and also persuading us to buy things while, others argue that this method is very common nowadays that is why they do not have much attention about that. I firmly believe that it is too common that human do not give longer attention.
On the one hand, many businessmen use this technique to grow up their work. Firstly, advertisement is available everywhere in the form of posters, tv shows and even when we go outside in the home. Most people also view their sites and commercial on the instragram. Secondly, persons has totally encourage and also connect to buy that thing. It is very good thing to boost their business.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0
The response responds to the task only minimally and fails to meet the required length, containing only 142 words compared to the minimum of 250 words. While you attempt to touch upon both views and briefly mention your opinion in the introduction ("I firmly believe that it is too common that human do not give longer attention"), the ideas are very limited and under-developed. The body paragraph only addresses one side of the argument superficially, leaving the discussion incomplete. To improve, you must ensure you write at least the minimum word count, fully address all parts of the prompt with extended ideas, and present a clear, well-supported position throughout the entire essay.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5
Information and ideas are not arranged coherently enough to create a clear progression. While you attempt to use transitional markers such as "On the one hand", "Firstly", and "Secondly", the overall organization suffers from abrupt shifts and a lack of logical flow between the few sentences provided. Paragraphing is attempted, but the body paragraph is cut short and lacks the structural integrity expected of a full essay. Referencing is also weak, making it difficult to follow the logical links between ideas. To move to a higher level, you need to structure your essay into distinct, balanced paragraphs with clear topic sentences and robust cohesive devices that seamlessly guide the reader through a well-developed argument.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is limited and repetitive, featuring basic terms such as "good thing", "buy that thing", and "grow up their work". There are noticeable lexical errors and awkward word choices, such as using "for boost" instead of "to boost", "crucial way for successful" instead of "crucial way to be successful", and mentioning "instragram" with a spelling error. These errors and the restricted range reflect a basic vocabulary level that struggles to convey precise meaning. To enhance your lexical resource, you should aim to learn and accurately apply less common vocabulary and precise collocations appropriate for academic topics, while carefully checking your word forms and spelling.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The writing demonstrates a very limited range of sentence structures, with frequent errors that cause difficulty for the reader. There are persistent issues with verb forms, tenses, and grammatical patterns, such as "use advertising for boost", "do not have much attention about that", and "persons has totally encourage". Articles and plurals are also misused in phrases like "in the home" and "human do not give longer attention". Complex sentence attempts are frequently faulty and distort meaning. To achieve a higher band, you must practice using a wider mix of accurate simple and complex sentence forms, paying close attention to subject-verb agreement, prepositions, and tense consistency.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.