Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-08

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Student answer (Band 4.0)

some people beleve that the advertising is estremly successful at persuading us to buy thinks .whele other people think that advertising is so comman that we no longer pay attention to it

in my point of view think we are leveing twentyone century so some people beleve that adversting is extremrly successful because people so bg in this time so i don't think human are so many intersting in adversting is extremly successful .because every people are bg in their life and every peplle have a smart phone so i don't thinlk people need adersting is extremly successful at persuading us to buy

secondly in my opinion i think village people think are using adversting so much because our country is verry poor i think lot's of village they did not have a good technology and internnet

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5

You introduce both views in the opening, and your opinion appears to be that advertising is not very persuasive because people are busy and use smartphones. However, the discussion is incomplete: the first body paragraph does not clearly explain why advertising might successfully persuade people, while the point about village residents and limited technology is difficult to connect to the view that advertising is widely ignored. Your position is therefore hard to follow, and the ideas are not developed with clear examples or explanation. The response contains 129 words, so it is 121 words below the 250-word minimum; the eight words copied from the task prompt are excluded. To improve, address each view directly, state your opinion clearly, and support each main point with relevant explanation.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 3.5

There is a basic attempt to organise the response: an opening, a paragraph beginning “in my point of view,” and another introduced by “secondly.” These markers show an effort to separate ideas. However, the progression is difficult to follow because the first body paragraph shifts between people being busy, smartphone ownership, and whether advertising persuades buyers without explaining the links. The final paragraph introduces village residents and poor technology, but its relationship to the question is unclear. Several sentences run together, and the repeated use of “because” does not create clear connections. Use one paragraph for each view, followed by a conclusion, and make each paragraph develop one central idea with clear linking and reference.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.0

You use some vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “advertising,” “persuading,” “technology,” and “internet,” so the reader can identify the general subject. However, the range is basic and repetitive, with “advertising” and “people” appearing frequently, and several spelling errors make the message harder to understand, such as “beleve,” “comman,” and “intersting.” Some phrases are also unclear or unnatural, including “people so bg in this time” and “village people think are using advertising.” Aim to use a wider set of precise topic words and check spelling carefully. For example, you could refer to “consumers,” “advertising campaigns,” and “purchase decisions,” while ensuring each phrase expresses your intended meaning.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.0

The response attempts to form longer sentences using connectors such as “because” and “so,” and the basic meaning can sometimes be recovered. However, sentence structures are often incomplete or incorrectly joined. For example, “in my point of view think we are…” lacks a clear subject and verb pattern, while “because every people are bg in their life” is not a complete sentence and has problems with agreement and number. The opening also joins two contrasting clauses without clear sentence punctuation. Most sentences rely on simple patterns, and errors frequently make relationships between ideas unclear. Practise complete subject–verb sentences, correct agreement and articles, and use full stops to separate ideas before attempting longer structures.

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