Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Student answer (Band 4.0)

Certain individuals believed advertising has a good impact on us ,by purchasing things. while other argues, that its too common such that many people are no longer given it good attention.I completely agree ,this is because of technology advancement,which enables information reaching many people fast, on the other hand,if advertising is too much many see it at not useful , therefore majority neglected it.

To begin with, Information reaching the populace at a fast pace due to technology development and yhis has improved sales via advertisement. to illustrate,many individuals owns smartphone which is been used on daily basis

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.0

You introduce both views and state a position with “I completely agree,” so the response is relevant to the question. However, the discussion is only minimally developed: the claim that technology helps advertising increase sales is begun, but the example about smartphone use is left unfinished, and the opposing view—that advertising is so common people ignore it—is only briefly asserted. Your opinion is also not clearly tied to a developed explanation. The response does not meet the required minimum length, which leaves major parts of the task unsupported. To improve, explain each view in a separate, complete paragraph, give a specific example for each, and conclude by clarifying which view you find more convincing.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is a basic attempt to organise the response: the opening introduces the two positions, and “To begin with” signals the start of a supporting point. Some linking expressions, including “while,” “on the other hand,” and “therefore,” show an effort to connect ideas. However, the progression is difficult to follow because several points are compressed into one long opening sentence, and the second paragraph stops before its example is complete. The contrast signalled by “on the other hand” is not developed into a distinct discussion. Use separate paragraphs for the two views and your opinion, and make sure each paragraph develops one main idea in a logical sequence.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some topic-relevant vocabulary, such as “advertising,” “technology development,” “sales,” and “populace,” and the reader can generally identify your intended subject. However, word choice and collocation are often inaccurate or unnatural, as in “has a good impact on us, by purchasing things,” “given it good attention,” and “see it at not useful.” “Populace” is also less natural here than a straightforward term such as “consumers.” Spelling errors, including “yhis,” further reduce accuracy. Aim for clear, natural phrases and check spelling; for example, explain that advertising “encourages consumers to make purchases” or that people “pay little attention to repeated advertisements.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt to connect clauses and express contrast, for example in the opening sentence and the sentence beginning “To begin with.” This shows some effort to use more than simple sentence patterns. However, control is inconsistent: “other argues” has incorrect subject–verb agreement, “many individuals owns” also has agreement error, and “which is been used” has a faulty verb form. Sentence boundaries and punctuation are also problematic, with full stops and commas used inconsistently and spaces appearing before commas. These errors sometimes make relationships between ideas unclear. Practise accurate subject–verb agreement and verb forms, then build shorter, complete sentences before combining them with conjunctions.

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