Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-22

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Some people say that doing advertising is a very good thing that persuading us to buy things while on the other hand some people do not believe on advertising they think that it is a common think. In my point of view i can say that advertisment is a good for bussines like today world is growing very fast and becoming much advance everyone use social media all type of age use mobile phone for Example kids watching mobile phone they see the add of different toys soo they order it if someone want to buy clothes they also order it this all things happening through advertisment i also have much believe on adds like i am a sports lover sometime i scrolling so some time adds come in front of me the very well they advertise it i love it very much and then order it so we can always promote over work because in my opinion advertisng gain much customer . I dont have much knowledge about other people who thing advertising is a common that we do not give proper attention to it i think that they consider it a time consuming thing because every time add come in front of them and i think that they do not like it and online shopping is little worthly so that's why they do not give much attention to this side. At the end overall i say that advertisment is a good work everyone should promote there work because it can gain much customers.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You give a clear overall opinion that advertising can help businesses gain customers, and your example of seeing sports-related adverts and then ordering something is relevant. You also mention the opposing view that people may stop paying attention because adverts appear repeatedly. However, the discussion of this second view is brief and partly speculative: you say people “consider it a time consuming thing” without explaining how advertising’s constant presence makes it ineffective. The response therefore addresses both sides, but only in a limited way, and the supporting ideas are not sufficiently developed. To strengthen the response, explain each view separately, add a specific reason or example for each, and make your own position more precise than simply calling advertising “a good work.”

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is a basic overall progression: you introduce the two views, give reasons for your own support of advertising, consider why others may ignore it, and finish with a conclusion. Some linking phrases, such as “while on the other hand” and “At the end overall,” signal these stages. However, most of the response is presented as one long paragraph, so the different parts of the discussion are difficult to distinguish. Ideas also run together in extended sentences, and connectors are repetitive or awkward, including repeated uses of “so” and “and.” Organise the essay into clear paragraphs for the introduction, each viewpoint, and the conclusion. Use a wider range of accurate links and clearer references so the reader can follow how each example supports your point.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some task-related vocabulary, including “advertising,” “promote,” “customers,” and “online shopping,” and the examples make your general meaning understandable. However, the vocabulary is basic and often repetitive, particularly the repeated use of “good,” “thing,” and “advertising.” Several word choices or combinations are unclear or unnatural, such as “advertisment is a good for bussines,” “online shopping is little worthly,” and “gain much customer.” Spelling errors such as “advertisment,” “bussines,” and “advertisng” also reduce accuracy. Build a more precise range for discussing effects and audience behaviour—for example, terms for attracting attention, influencing purchasing decisions, and ignoring repeated messages—and check spelling and collocations when editing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt to connect ideas in longer sentences, for example when describing children seeing toy adverts and ordering products, and you use some basic sentence patterns to express your opinion. However, sentence structures are often incomplete or run together, and errors frequently make the relationships between ideas hard to follow. Examples include “a very good thing that persuading us,” “everyone use social media,” and “if someone want to buy clothes they also order it.” There are recurring problems with verb forms, subject–verb agreement, articles, and sentence boundaries, as well as missing capitalisation and punctuation. Practise writing shorter, complete sentences first, then combine them using accurate clauses. Check each sentence for a clear subject and verb, and use full stops to separate distinct ideas.

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