Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-10-23

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In todays world, where digital aspect of a technology is been all around the world. Many business especially the online business, either small or large are running on social media, an advertisement is playing a very important role to attract customers to purchase. Many people still might think it is not necessary to invest in advertisement or pay less attention to it, often suffer indifference consequences.In my opinion, i don't think it is a smart choice to not use resources like advertising to persuade buyers to grow any business.

If we analysize some businesses such as clothing, skin care show that they brought many customers to persuade to buy products are highly through the advertisement. Many renown brands: for instance clothing use billboard sign and run campaigns to launch their collection. While the other brands which are online base brought traffic to their websites and online stores through marketing and PR. Brands often win in competing with their competitors increase their sales through advertisement and branding creatively.

Although many businesses which do not invest in advertising or invest poorly on advertisement, often get low sales or worst they have to shut their stores.For example: not using social media platform to tell their story which convince customers to buy their products or may use low resolution images which are not convincing enough for people to invest their money.

For instance: There are two online skin care brands, one who is been consistently sharing and posting customer's reviews, feedback advertising their products using celebrities. On the other hand, the second brand just launch their product and not paying much attention to promoting product or build customer trust and hoping to find people miraculously, which one have higher chance to persuading people to buy their products and build trust?

In conclusion, advertising is important part of persuading individuals to buy products and help business to thrives more. It is important to invest in advertising because in today's era, it almost free of cost and it helps to build trust between business and customer and make their connection valuable.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

Your position is clear in the introduction and conclusion: you believe advertising helps businesses persuade customers and grow. You also give relevant examples, including clothing brands using billboards and an online skincare comparison. However, the task asks you to discuss both views, and the opposing view—that advertising is so widespread that people stop noticing it—is not meaningfully explained. Instead, the essay mainly argues that businesses suffer when they advertise little or poorly. The examples support your position, but several points are asserted rather than fully explained, such as advertising being “almost free of cost.” To strengthen the response, explain why some consumers ignore frequent advertising, then weigh that view against its persuasive effects before reaching your conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, supporting paragraphs, an example, and a conclusion. The skincare-brand comparison gives the reader a concrete line of development, and phrases such as “On the other hand” signal contrast. However, progression is not consistently clear: the first body paragraph discusses successful advertising, while the next repeats the idea that businesses with weak advertising perform poorly, without developing the opposing view in the prompt. Some links are awkward or unclear, including “For instance:” before the comparison and the long rhetorical question at the end of that paragraph. Improve cohesion by assigning each body paragraph a distinct purpose, using clear topic sentences, and linking examples explicitly to the two views.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “advertisement,” “customers,” “campaigns,” “traffic,” “branding,” and “customer trust,” which helps communicate the subject. There are also attempts at more specific expressions, such as “low-resolution images” and “consistently sharing and posting customer reviews.” However, word choice and collocation are often inaccurate or repetitive: “brought traffic” is less natural than “attracted traffic,” and “indifference consequences” does not clearly express the intended meaning. Spelling and word-form errors such as “analysize,” “renown,” and “online base” also reduce precision. Build a more reliable range by learning common advertising collocations and checking spelling and forms, while avoiding repeated use of “advertisement” where “promotion” or “marketing” fits.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt a mixture of simple and longer sentences, including a conditional example and a contrast between two brands. However, complex sentences are often faulty, and errors occur frequently enough to make some relationships difficult to follow. For example, “In todays world, where digital aspect of a technology is been all around the world” is not a complete, well-formed sentence, while “Many business … are running” has an agreement error. Verb forms and sentence construction are also problematic in “which one have higher chance to persuading people.” Articles, plurals, and punctuation need attention as well. Practise building accurate subject–verb–object sentences first, then add subordinate clauses and check each sentence for a complete main clause and consistent verb forms.

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