Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-11-01
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
Todays world some people believe that advertising is extremly successful at persuading us to buy some things. While, think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention. In my pespective, advertisting is very sucessful nowaday because most of the people prefer to online shopping which is safe huge time .
There are many reasons why advertistment is successful because , peple easily influence about this and the can buy anything that. When individuals utilize they are phone and watching short videos in fornt there are scen show the add specily young childern they want to buy something .They tell there are parent and the way enhance the advertising busines successful.
On the other hand, advertisment is very common that is no longer pay attention, advertising some time is give wrong imformation beacuse when individuals want to buy encrouges about the advertising at that moment some time they deamnd high cost. I think that is the main reason . Some products is not suitable for that why people buy physical store.
In conclusion, asvertisment is very success in the world people buy any think from onlie beacuse which safe our time. I strongly believe that persuading us to buy things.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5
You give a clear opinion that advertising remains persuasive, and you attempt to discuss both views, including online shopping and misleading information or high prices. However, the opposing view is only briefly stated, and the reasons are not developed with clear explanation or examples. The conclusion repeats your position rather than drawing the discussion together. The response is also 190 words, which is 60 words below the 250-word minimum; the 12 words copied from the task prompt were not counted. This limits the space available to address both sides fully. To strengthen the response, explain how repeated exposure can make people ignore adverts, then support each view with a specific, relevant example.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
The response has a basic paragraph structure: an introduction, a paragraph supporting advertising’s influence, a contrasting paragraph, and a conclusion. Connectors such as “On the other hand” and “In conclusion” help signal the intended direction. However, progression within paragraphs is often difficult to follow, and several ideas are joined without clear links—for example, the discussion moves from children seeing adverts to telling their parents, then to business success. Some transitions are also awkward, such as “While, think that…”. Use one main point per paragraph and explain the connection between each claim and its example. Clearer referencing and more accurate linking would make the argument easier to follow.
Lexical Resource: Band 4.5
You use some task-relevant vocabulary, including “persuading,” “advertising,” “influence,” and “misinformation,” and you attempt to express ideas about online shopping and product costs. However, the range is limited and several words or phrases are repeated, particularly “successful” and “buy.” Frequent spelling errors—such as “extremly,” “advertistment,” and “sucessful”—and inaccurate or unclear expressions such as “safe huge time” and “demand high cost” can make your meaning difficult to understand. Build a small set of accurate topic phrases and check spelling carefully. More precise wording for consumer behaviour and advertising effects would help you explain your ideas without relying on repeated basic terms.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5
You attempt both simple statements and longer clauses, including “because most of the people prefer to online shopping” and “when individuals want to buy…”. However, sentence structures are very limited overall, and errors occur frequently enough to obscure meaning. Examples include missing or incorrect verbs (“While, think that…”), faulty clause construction (“the can buy anything that”), and problems with agreement and articles (“Some products is not suitable”). Punctuation also makes some sentences hard to parse, with misplaced commas and missing sentence boundaries. Practise building accurate subject–verb–object sentences first, then add subordinate clauses using “because,” “when,” and “although.” Proofread each sentence for a complete verb and a clear subject.
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