Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-11-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In this world, if anybody tries their hard and soul to achive anything eventually they will successfull. By the reason children are told that they can achive anyting if they try hard enough.

I totally agreed with this statement that, when anybody wanted something if they tried for it they will have the result. but, yes, there are some limitations as well.

To begin with, if you wanted to achive anything trying hard and soul is the only way to achive it or your are lucky enough. Furthermore, Sometimes working hard is not enough, you have to work smartly as well. So, for this particular reasons childrens are often told that try your best to do this work. It creates the mentality in their early age and it will help them in their devleopment criteria as well. When i was a child, their were a particular story that happened with me. I was only 15 years old that time. I saw some of my friends were really good at drawing stuffs. From that day, i started different kind of drawing and practice it regularly and now, i am the best artist of my university.

Howeveer, there are also some boundaries of your wants, like if you wanted to become the prime minister of bangladesh it needed hard and cleaver work anlong with favouring your luck. Sometimes trying hard is not enough for the betterment. It also needed other sector to evaluated as well.

Overall, i totally agreeded with the statement that children should be often told that trying hard will achive anything that they have ever wanted. It will boost their credibilty.

In conclusion hard working is the main thiing forr better future and achivement.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You give a clear general view that effort can help children achieve goals, and the drawing anecdote offers relevant personal support. However, the task asks for both advantages and disadvantages, and the response develops the benefits much more than the drawbacks. The disadvantage is reduced to brief comments about “boundaries” and luck, without explaining how the message might create unrealistic expectations, disappointment, or self-blame when a goal is unattainable. Your position also shifts: you agree that effort can achieve anything, then acknowledge limitations, but the conclusion returns to the absolute claim. Develop both sides with specific explanations and qualify the claim—for example, effort improves the chance of success but cannot guarantee every outcome.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a basic essay structure, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Paragraphs also signal a change of direction through phrases such as “To begin with” and “However.” However, the overall progression is not consistently clear: the first body paragraph moves from effort and luck to smart work, childhood development, and then a personal story, while the disadvantage paragraph gives only a few loosely connected points. Linking phrases such as “Furthermore” and “Overall” sometimes announce connections rather than making the relationship between ideas clear. The conclusion repeats the opening position and is followed by another concluding sentence. Group each paragraph around one main point, explain it in sequence, and use references and transitions to show how examples support that point.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use a small range of relevant vocabulary, including “working hard,” “work smartly,” “limitations,” and “development,” and the drawing example makes your meaning generally understandable. However, vocabulary is repetitive, especially the repeated use of “achieve” and “trying hard,” and several inaccurate word choices or collocations make parts difficult to interpret. For example, “trying hard and soul” is not a natural expression, “boost their credibility” does not clearly express the intended benefit, and “other sector to evaluated” is unclear. Spelling errors such as “achive,” “anyting,” and “Howeveer” are also noticeable. Build a more precise range for discussing outcomes and risks, and check spelling, word forms, and common word partnerships.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt some longer sentences and subordinate clauses, for example, “Sometimes working hard is not enough, you have to work smartly as well.” However, the range is limited, and complex attempts are often faulty. Errors in verb forms and agreement occur in “they will successful,” “if they tried for it they will have the result,” and “children should be often told.” Sentence boundaries and punctuation are also inconsistent: the example beginning “Sometimes working hard is not enough” joins two independent clauses with only a comma, and several sentences begin with lowercase “but” or “i.” These problems sometimes make relationships between ideas harder to follow. Practise accurate conditional forms and complete sentence structures, then proofread for agreement, tense consistency, capitalization, and punctuation.

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