Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-11-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In a few region, adolescence are often told that they can attain anything what they can if they do hard work. Although children have clearly set their goals and focus on their studies, in some cases students may feel burden.

The main advantages of this children have set their goals at a very young age and they focus on it instead of doing something else. Like most students get confused when they select their university subjects but if they clearly know which field they choose they can start doing hard working and achieve their goals. Furthermore, teaching youngsters hard working is very benefical for their career and lives also. For example, most pupils who study hard from the start of the session they feel relaxed in exams rather than others students who just study when the exams arrive. As a result, they face supply in their course and repeat the course again.

The main drawback is that, people do too much effort in wrong side where they just cope the problem with mentally. Like most youngsters who study day and night to memorize the formula of Mathematic numericals and at the end they just got average marks on the other side, those pupils who just understand the concept got good marks in this subjects. So, evertimes work hard is not beneficial always do effort on those things where they needs.

In conclusion, in some cultures, people are often teach their offspring to work hard then too can get anything whatever you want. Working hard remove the laziness from inside the children althrough sometimes smart work outweigh the hardwork.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both sides of the question and give a relevant overall view: encouragement can help children pursue goals, while effort without an effective approach may not bring success. The examples about choosing university subjects and preparing for exams support the advantages, and the contrast between memorising formulas and understanding concepts illustrates a disadvantage. However, the discussion is uneven: the benefits are explained in more detail, while the drawback focuses mainly on study methods and does not fully explore the pressure or disappointment children may experience when they cannot achieve a goal. The conclusion also introduces laziness and “smart work” without developing their connection to the question. Develop each point more clearly and keep the focus on the message children receive.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for advantages and disadvantages, and a conclusion. This makes the main direction easy to follow. You also use signposts such as “Furthermore,” “For example,” “As a result,” and “In conclusion” to show relationships between ideas. However, some links are mechanical or unclear: “The main advantages of this children have set their goals” does not clearly introduce the point, and “on the other side” is awkwardly used to contrast the two groups of students. References such as “they” and “those pupils” can also be difficult to track. Use clearer topic sentences and make each example’s connection to its main point explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “goals,” “career,” “memorize,” “formula,” and “concept,” and you attempt phrases such as “cope the problem with mentally.” However, the range is limited and several inaccurate word choices or collocations make parts of the argument difficult to understand. For example, “face supply in their course” does not convey the intended consequence, while “do hard work,” “hard working,” and “do too much effort” are repeated or unnatural. Spelling and word-form errors such as “benefical,” “evertimes,” and “althrough” also affect clarity. Build a more precise set of expressions for effort, achievement, pressure, and effective study, and check collocations and spelling.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a concession beginning “Although” and conditional structures such as “if they clearly know.” This shows some range, and the reader can generally identify your main points. However, errors in sentence formation and grammatical relationships recur. For instance, “In a few region, adolescence are often told” has problems with number and agreement, while “people are often teach their offspring” uses an incorrect verb form. The sentence beginning “The main advantages of this children…” is also difficult to parse, and several clauses are joined without clear grammatical control. Practise accurate subject–verb agreement, articles and plurals, and build complex sentences around one clear main clause.

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