Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-07-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 6.5)

It is believed in many cultures that children can get anything by working hard. There are a several benefits of it because it can encuorage children as well as make them disciplined for the future, whereas drawbacks of this message can not be ignored because it can not only impact their mental health but also effact their career.

To commence with, it can help to inspire their children for the bright future. This is because when parents give this message to their children, then they feel motivated and work hard to achieve that goal. Apart from this, it helps to make young generation disciplined in early age because when they are motivated by their parents to achieve anything desired, they follow parents instructions, which help them to get up early, study regulary and attend classess everyday. For example, Mary kom who is famous female boxer and she became famous boxer only because of her partners motivation. As a result, children who stay motivated in their lives are mor likely to perform.

Initially, telling children to try hard to attain anything can impact their mental well being. This happens because when parents force their children to work hard from early age, they can suffer from mental issues such depression, anger and stress, which can reduce their abaility to perform well. Another reason for this is many parents compel their adults to choose a career that they do not like at all. This can be seen in the case of Yuvraj Singh who is well know circket player but he wanted to became a bedminton player as a child, however his father forced him to be circke

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses both the advantages and disadvantages of the prompt. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. The first body paragraph provides relevant points about motivation and discipline, though the example of Mary Kom is slightly underdeveloped. The second body paragraph starts to discuss mental health and career pressure, but the response ends abruptly mid-sentence, leaving the final argument incomplete. This lack of a conclusion and the unfinished final point prevent the response from fully developing its ideas, which is a requirement for higher bands.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organized into paragraphs, and there is a clear attempt to use cohesive devices such as 'To commence with', 'Apart from this', and 'As a result'. However, the progression of ideas is interrupted by the incomplete final sentence. Referencing is generally clear, but the flow between sentences is occasionally mechanical. The paragraphing is logical, but the abrupt ending significantly impacts the overall coherence of the piece.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

The vocabulary is adequate for the task, allowing the student to express ideas clearly. There are some spelling errors, such as 'encuorage', 'effact', 'regulary', 'classess', and 'abaility'. While these errors are noticeable, they do not impede communication. The student uses some topic-specific vocabulary like 'disciplined', 'motivated', and 'mental well-being', but the range is somewhat limited and lacks the precision or sophistication required for higher bands.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The student uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues (e.g., 'There are a several benefits') and article usage errors. Punctuation is generally functional, but the incomplete sentence at the end is a significant grammatical and structural flaw. While the meaning is usually clear, the frequency of errors in basic grammar prevents a higher score.

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