Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-07-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Student answer (Band 6.5)

It is often argued that in some traditions, individuals most frequently told their off spring that they get everything if working with determination and hard work. There are numerous cons and pons of this approach.

On the one hand, it is a fact that parents should boost confidence and stamina of their children. There are various benefits of this method. Firstly, in the early cognitive development of a baby, he might be more likely become energetic, task oriented, motivated or either be lazy, careless and poor task mangement skills. At that stage parents give them confidence to withstand in society. It polish his communication skills, overall academics as well as sports. For example, when i was in 8th grade, my father helped me in studies and give quick a advice that there is nothing in the universe you cannot accquire, then i burn the midnight oil and got a first position over the district.

On the other hand, there are multiple demerits of over motivation. One compelling reason fo this stance is that, in todays's contemporary era, youngsters insists to purchase the latest i phone or laptop, so they can work dedicated on their video games for reaching the highest levels. Moreover, there is a lack of direction in this statement, as it affects health, mental wellbeing. For instance, my cousin joined gym to win the athletic tournament, he did exercise for 10 hours on a daily basis and even use steroids which results in his nervous breakdown.

In conclusion, children are often told that they can get everthing if they worked mindfully. It enhance their determination and will power. However, its has disadvantages such as lack of direction and proper counselling.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses both the advantages and disadvantages of the prompt. However, the development of ideas is somewhat inconsistent. While the advantage section provides a personal example, the disadvantage section is less clear, as the link between 'over-motivation' and the examples provided (video games or steroid use) is not fully explained or logically connected to the core concept of the prompt. The position is clear, but the arguments could be more thoroughly extended to reach a higher band. The introduction and conclusion are present but somewhat repetitive in their phrasing.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear attempt to use cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand', 'Firstly', and 'Moreover'. However, some of these transitions feel mechanical or slightly misused, such as 'or either be lazy' in the first body paragraph, which disrupts the flow. Referencing is occasionally unclear, and the progression of ideas within paragraphs could be smoother. The essay is coherent overall, but the logical links between sentences sometimes require the reader to infer meaning.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks precision and variety. There are several instances of awkward word choices or non-standard collocations, such as 'cons and pons' (likely a misspelling of pros and cons), 'off spring', and 'give quick a advice'. While the student attempts to use some topic-specific vocabulary like 'cognitive development' and 'contemporary era', the overall range is limited. Spelling errors, such as 'accquire' and 'everthing', occur, though they do not significantly impede communication.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues ('youngsters insists', 'it enhance'), incorrect verb tenses ('if they worked'), and missing articles. Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with apostrophes ('todays's'). While the meaning is generally clear, these persistent errors demonstrate a lack of control over complex structures, which limits the score in this criterion.

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