Band 7.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 7.5 · Cambridge IELTS 15 · 2026-07-30
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?
Student answer (Band 7.5)
In some cultures, parents and teachers tell children that they can succeed at anything as long as they work hard enough. This essay will discuss both the benefits and the drawbacks of this kind of message.
There are several advantages to encouraging children in this way. First, it helps them stay motivated and not give up easily when they face problems. If a child believes that trying hard will eventually lead to success, they are more willing to continue practicing a skill or studying a difficult subject. This can also make children more confident and willing to take on new challenges instead of avoiding them because they are afraid of failing.
On the other hand, this message also has some disadvantages. One problem is that it is not always true. In real life, things like natural talent, money, and opportunities also affect whether someone can achieve their goals, not just effort. When children grow up and realize this, they might feel confused or upset that they were told something that was not completely correct. Another disadvantage is that children may blame themselves too much when they fail, thinking it only happened because they did not try hard enough. This can lead to stress and a loss of confidence, especially when the failure was actually caused by factors outside their control.
In conclusion, while telling children that hard work leads to success can help them stay motivated and confident, it is important for parents to also explain that other factors can affect the outcome. This way, children can still work hard without feeling like every failure is completely their own fault.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 7.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 7.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 7.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 7.5 |
| Overall | 7.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.5
The response addresses all parts of the prompt, providing a clear discussion of both the advantages and disadvantages of the message. The position is consistent throughout, and the ideas are well-developed. For instance, the explanation of how the message can lead to self-blame when failure occurs is a sophisticated point that adds depth to the argument. The essay is balanced, and the conclusion effectively synthesizes the main points. To reach a higher band, you could provide more specific examples or real-world scenarios to illustrate your points, which would further extend the development of your arguments.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.5
The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph has a central theme, and the progression of ideas is easy to follow. You use cohesive devices such as 'First', 'On the other hand', and 'In conclusion' effectively to guide the reader. The referencing is clear, and the paragraphing is appropriate. To improve, you could incorporate a wider variety of cohesive devices or transition phrases to link sentences more fluidly, as some transitions are currently quite standard.
Lexical Resource — Band 7.0
The vocabulary is adequate for the task and allows for clear communication. You use relevant terms such as 'motivated', 'natural talent', and 'factors outside their control'. However, the range is somewhat limited and relies on fairly common language. To achieve a higher band, you should aim to incorporate more precise, less common lexical items or collocations that demonstrate a more sophisticated command of the language, such as 'innate ability' instead of 'natural talent' or 'detrimental consequences' instead of 'disadvantages'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 7.5
The essay demonstrates a good mix of simple and complex sentence structures. Most of your sentences are error-free, and the grammar is generally accurate, which ensures that your meaning is never obscured. You use conditional structures effectively, such as 'If a child believes that trying hard will eventually lead to success...'. While the control is good, the range of complex structures is somewhat limited. To improve, try to incorporate more varied subordinate clauses or passive constructions to demonstrate greater grammatical flexibility.
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